Instant Coaching for Busy Managers: How to Have Constructive Conversations in the Workplace
Jonathan Payne
Published by: Jonathan Payne at Smashwords
P.O. Box 1011
Gillitts, 3603
South Africa
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Copyright 2011: Jonathan Payne
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CHAPTER 1 : THE PROBLEM
In my training seminars I often ask people to write down one workplace related problem which they would like to have resolved. As I go through the problems I invariably find near the top of the list come issues related to communication.
What fascinates me is that these same people who say there are problems with communication in the organisation are the ones who complain that they are drowning in emails and are swamped with meetings.
So we have the interesting situation where people are in constant contact with each other, yet they have communication problems.
Clearly the problem doesn’t lie with the quantity of communication. In fact those who work in the 21st century organisation are more connected with each other and with the wider business environment than ever before. There is a tsunami of information passing through the workplace. So quantity of communication is not the issue. If anything there is too much of it.
If it’s not the quantity, the problem must lie with the quality of communication. And by quality of communication I don’t mean good presentation skills, clarity of speech or systems to ensure everyone has read the memo.
By good quality communication I mean communication which moves the mission of the organisation forward. It is communication with purpose leading toward a clear, understood outcome. It is constructive communication.
Many workplace conversations end “up in the air.” They don’t come to a definite conclusion, are short on accountability and often lack purpose, clarity and focus. These conversations fail to use time and effort constructively. They can be conversations between individuals or group meetings. They lead to frustration because of the lack of constructive communication.
How many of your conversations at work would you describe as “constructive”?
A constructive conversation:
Has purpose, clarity and focus
Moves issues forward
Generates sound, creative thinking
Makes the best use of the time available
Keeps responsibility with the right person
Is strong on accountability
Ends with a commitment to action
Constructive conversations draw on the basic principles of management coaching and are really instant coaching conversations. They can be used in any work situation from quick chats over coffee to longer performance appraisal sessions. They are useful for strategic planning sessions or disciplinary meetings.
There are four elements to a constructive conversation:
Clear Structure
Careful Listening
Incisive Questions
Definite Commitment
CHAPTER 2 : STRUCTURE
Get the map in place
The key to a constructive conversation is structure. By having a “roadmap” for the conversation in mind you can make sure it covers the essential areas and moves along to a useful conclusion.
By far the most effective and simple structure for a constructive conversation was designed by John Whitmore in his book “Coaching for Performance” (Nicholas Brealey Publishing; 4th edition – London: 2009). It is called the GROW model, an acronym for:
Goal
Reality
Options
Way Forward
It’s easy to remember. You want your part of the business to GROW – and that will give you the points you have to cover in the conversation.
Know your GOAL
Make sure you know what you want to achieve as a result of the conversation.
The goal for the conversation can be set by you or by the person you are talking to depending on the situation. But do make sure that the goal is clear. The goal is a different situation or behaviour from where you find yourself at the start of the conversation. It is where you want to end up at the end of the journey. If the goal looks like what you have already - evaluate why you are having the conversation at all.
Time Saver Tip:
If you are asked to attend a meeting, ask the person calling the meeting what the goal of the meeting is. If they can’t clearly state the goal, either don’t attend the meeting (it will produce much talk and no action) or have a conversation to help them define the goal.
You could state a goal as:
“By the end of this conversation I want to know what I should do to decrease wastage by ten percent”, or
“By the end of this conversation we will have dates, a theme and venue suggestions for the convention,” or
“By the end of this conversation I will know exactly when Peter will deliver the report.”
Another way to come to the goal is to ask: “What is the question we want to answer?”
For the above examples you might ask:
“How am I going to decrease wastage by ten percent?”
“What will the dates, theme and venue be for our convention?”
“When will Peter deliver the report?”
The goal must be clear so that you know you have come to the end of the conversation when you have achieved it. The conversations in the examples can end, and should end, when there is a clear plan to decrease wastage by ten percent, the dates, theme and venue suggestions are in place or you know exactly when Peter will deliver the report.