How to Write a Book Blurb That Sells
(And other ebook marketing advice)
By Marti Talbott
Copyright 2011 Marti Talbott
Smashwords Edition
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How to do Everything Wrong
What a rat race -- you find a well-known editor to proof your manuscript and he ends up telling you what you already know -- your book is good! He corrects two commas, three misspelled words and sends it back with his bill for two dollars a page. Ouch!
Next, you need an Agent, "they say." So you send away for guidelines, and then submit to every known Agent, plus some that aren't so well known. If you're lucky, you successfully avoid all the scam artists who want another chunk of your money, but man, you've got a bestselling novel and there isn't an Agent alive who hasn't already got more clients than they can handle. Isn‘t anyone paying attention to your offer to make them rich? Sooner or later you begin to suspect most of your query letters were actually read by high school boys, with baggy pants, holding down after school jobs.
Now what? At least a hundred times you've read warnings against submitting directly to publishers, but what choice do you have? You bite the bullet, carefully select small publishers and send off another round of well-written, heart-stopping queries. In six months, you have another three-ringed binder full of rejections.
Desperation finally sets in and you trade your mild-mannered writer's hat for a medieval helmet and a spear. Getting published is going to take a lot more ingenuity than you thought. You check the laws and find out how easy it is for your best friend to become a Literary Agent. You design some nice stationary, write the book proposal and use your friend's new Agency name and address on the letterhead. You're not doing anything illegal, you tell yourself, because you're not cheating anyone -- it's your book!
Off goes another round of queries with the first three chapters, to the big impressive publishers. Sure enough, the editors begin to write nice letters back to you (I mean your Agent) saying meaningful things like, "We loved the voice, but the book needs a little more action in the beginning to grab the readers attention." Amazingly, they add really nice things like, "Do keep us in mind for your next submission."
Good grief, there are actually people working in those big publishing houses. They do listen to Agents! You don't have a sale, but at least you know what to fix! The thing is, by now you're beginning to wonder what you and your friend would do if you did get a contract -- run to a lawyer? What it what you're doing actually is illegal?
There must be a better way.
Now you're on the Internet and you're learning a lot about the book publishing industry. You hear authors talking about Publishers who don't pay at all, or cook their books to pay authors less. Well known Authors are working day jobs to pay the rent. You had no idea this was happening and now you're kind of glad you didn't get a contract.
Next, you find out about Print on Demand Publishers. They're not like Vanity Publishers, right? Wrong!