SHIT THAT PISSES ME OFF
by
Peg Tittle
Smashwords Edition
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Published on Smashwords by:
Magenta
Shit That Pisses Me Off
Copyright 2011 by Peg Tittle
Cover design by Donna Casey based on a concept by Peg Tittle
Thanks
to Ben for the series title
All rights reserved. Without limiting the rights under copyright reserved above, no part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in or introduced into a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form, or by any means (electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise) without the prior written permission of both the copyright owner and the above publisher of this book.
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Also by Peg Tittle
Critical Thinking: An Appeal to Reason
What If…Collected Thought Experiments in Philosophy
Should Parents be Licensed? Debating the Issues
Ethical Issues in Business—Inquiries, Cases, and Readings
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Contents
1. You Oughtta Need a Licence for That
4. Drugs and Sports—What’s the Problem?
6. Profit and Loss—and Marbles
7. I’m not a feminist. Feminism is so over. We live in a post-feminist world.
12. In Commemoration of the Holocaust
13. Hockey Brawls and other Cockfights
18. Why Don’t We Have Professional Jurors?
19. Bambi’s Cousin’s Gonna Tear You Apart
22. I’m too drunk. No I’m not.
23. From Romeo and Juliet to ‘Ass’ and ‘Hole’
You Oughtta Need a Licence for That
We have successfully cloned a sheep; it’s not unreasonable, then, to believe we may soon be able to create human life. Despite Frankenstein visions of a brave new world, I’m sure we’ll develop carefully considered policies and procedures to regulate the activity.
For example, I doubt we’ll allow someone to create his own private workforce or his own little army.
And I suspect we’ll prohibit cloning oneself for mere ego gratification.
Doing it just because it’s fun will certainly be illegal. And I expect it won’t even be imaginable to do it ‘without really thinking about it’, let alone ‘by accident’.
I suspect we’ll enforce some sort of quality control, such that cloned human beings shall not exist in pain or be severely ‘compromised’ with respect to basic biological or biochemical functioning.
And I suspect one will have to apply for a license and satisfy rigorous screening standards. I assume this will include the submission, and approval, of a detailed plan regarding responsibility for the cloned human being; surely we won’t allow a scientist to create it and then just leave it on the lab’s doorstep one night when he leaves.
Thing is, we can already create human life. Kids and addicts do it every day.
And though we’ve talked ourselves silly and tied ourselves in knots about ending life—active, passive, voluntary, coerced, premeditated, accidental, negligent—we’ve been horrendously silent, irresponsibly laissez-faire, about beginning life.
We wouldn’t accept such wanton creation of life if it happened in the lab. Why do we condone it when it happens in bedrooms and backseats?
It should be illegal to create life, to have kids, in order to have another pair of hands at work in the field or to have someone to look after you in your old age.
It should be illegal to create a John Doe Junior to carry on the family name/business.
It should be illegal to have kids because, well, it just sort of happened, you didn’t really think about it.
And it isn’t possible to create life ‘by accident’—men don’t accidentally ejaculate into vaginas and women don’t accidentally catch ejaculate with their vaginas. (As for failed contraception, there’s follow-up contraception.)
And it should be illegal to knowingly create a life that will be spent in pain and/or that will be severely substandard.
As for the screening process, we already do that for adoptive/foster parents. Why do we cling to the irrational belief that biological parents are necessarily competent parents—in the face of overwhelming evidence to the contrary? We have, without justification, a double standard.
Oh but we can’t interfere with people’s right to reproduce! Right to reproduce? Merely having a capability doesn’t entail the right to exercise that capability. (Re)Production, with its attendant responsibilities, should be a privilege, not a right.
And yes of course, this proposal, this argument for parenting licenses, opens the door for all sorts of abuses. For starters, who will design and administer the screening process? But look around: it’s not as if the current situation is abuse-free. In fact, millions of the little human lives we’ve created so carelessly are being starved, beaten, or otherwise traumatized. Millions.
To be succinct: the destruction of life is subject to moral and legal examination; so too should be the creation of life, whenever and however it occurs.
What’s in a Flag?
I noticed at the beginning of the summer that one of the weekenders had hung a large Canadian flag in her cottage window. And two of the year-rounders had Canadian flags on poles. By the end of the summer, there were about fifteen. I was surprised. This is Canada. We aren’t American. So what’s with the flags?
Well, maybe that’s it. It’s to say we aren’t American. Many Canadian tourists wear a Canadian flag on their knapsacks for the same reason American tourists wear a Canadian flag on their knapsacks. But then why not just fly an American flag with the red slash of “No!” through it? Maybe because that wouldn’t be very nice. And, well, we’re Canadian.
Furthermore, it’s a small lake. Everyone here already knows these people are Canadian. (Though I don’t actually know about the new summer people—they could be American.)
So again, what’s with the flag? Are these people just saying they’re proud to be Canadian? Well, they can’t. They can’t do that. How can you be proud to be Canadian? You can be proud of running a marathon in under four hours. That’s an accomplishment. Being Canadian is just an accident. In order to be proud of something, you have to have had something to do with that something. It’s nonsense for me to say I’m proud that we’ve walked on the Moon. Who’s this ‘we’? I had nothing to do with it. So I can’t take any credit for it. So I can’t possibly be proud of it.
So how can you be proud to be Canadian? Did you make Canada what it is today? I don’t think so.