A Dream Floats in Oblivion & Other Stories
By Raja Sharma
Copyright@2011Raja Sharma
Smashwords Edition
Chapter 1: Preface
The world of stories is so enchanting and vast that there is always scope for innumerable new ideas and styles. Some write to give vent to their emotions and it is a kind of catharsis to them, some write to instruct and teach and it is a platform whence they are able to show their superiority over millions, and some write to leave their mark on the posterity, but I write for the sake of writing for I don’t know anything else, and it gives me extreme satisfaction.
I am a kind of scavenger and I am often successful in picking the shreds mostly left by others. With a little effort I join the pieces and create something that delights me and my readers.
In this book, I have a few stories which will acquaint you with the contemporary life which the Western World is mostly ignorant about.
Raja Sharma
Chapter 2: A Dream Floats in Oblivian
This wait has become intolerable to them and they have started leaving one by one. They know that the moment is approaching and it may happen any instant but they are not ready to prolong their stay there. They have been waiting for twenty two days, expecting it to happen any moment. Some of them joke that she is going to take twelve months. My pregnancy has become a topic of discussion for the big family of sixty five members.
Though they have their separate kitchens, the mentality of the joint family is still there. They keep on peeping into the lives of others: what is being cooked in the elder brother’s house? Who is visiting them today? What has she brought for her daughter? Why have they not woken up early today? Who, among the daughters-in-law, touched the father-in-law’s feet without covering her head? What did mother-in-law say?
They do not hesitate from asking about the things which take place in the bedroom of a husband and wife. In my first year, I felt very nervous while facing their questions.
In the presence of my husband I felt quite comfortable because he handled the barrage of questions. In this big family, in early days, it was like my Math class where I relied mostly on my memory. My father-in-law has seven brothers and their seven wives. Then they have their daughters-in-law, and their children. My husband has three brothers and two sisters, one older and the other younger than my husband. Then there are hundreds of relatives. It used to be quite difficult to choose among the elders while it came to touching their feet for their blessings, for preference to one could anger the other.
The mother-in-law and other elder women would attack me with their questions: what have you cooked today? The smell is very sweet. Did your parents sent this dress or Vicky bought it for you? We have cooked rice and curry today. Green vegetables are hard to find…Do you know how to stitch and do embroidery?
My mother-in-law often came to my help while answering such questions, though none of them seemed to be concerned about the answers because they asked continuously, without waiting for the answer to their earlier querries. I think they gave vent to the thoughts which got accumulated and it was a kind of catharsis and they felt happy after that.
Some of them brought their dishes from their houses and in return I gave them some parts of my cuisine. There was no problem because if you did not like one dish, you could always exchange it. We generally have five or six vegetable dishes on our table.
I was from a small family and my mother often said to my father, “We shall marry our daughter in a big family. Look at me, I am alone in the house and it is very difficult to pass time. Living in a joint big family has many advantages, no one feels lonely.”
She was right because I am never alone in this big house, even when Vicky, my husband, is out of station.
In his absence, my younger sister-in-law shared my room with me. She would read every letter which Vicky wrote to me. I would be frightened lest she should tell about those letters to the other members of my family. She used everything without any kind of hesitation: my cosmetics, soaps, perfumes, dresses, and even my shoes and slippers. Since there were so many relatives, the entire day passed in meeting one or the other unknown face. Mornings began at five and the day ended at about 11:00 pm. In those days my condition was quite ridiculous; I could neither smile nor cry at my own will. I had to do everything taking account of the other members present there. I knew that I had to spend my life in this house, so I began to learn things patiently, trying to adept myself to these new surroundings.
In the third year, when I conceived for the first time, a wave of joy ran through the house. The news spread to the neighbourhood and people began to flock our house. There were good wishes and congratulations from all sides, with all the laughter and sweets to eat. My mother-in-law began to collect things for her grandson who was still in my womb. My mother began to send me letters with innumerable instructions: don’t climb stairs fast, don’t pick heavy things; don’t lose your cool if you feel angry; read good books; eat healthy food; speak politely with everyone…..
Nothing impressed me, for I felt that I had been fighting a lonely battle in this big house. During the nights, with Vicky, I forgot everything for a few hours but the morning light reminded me over and again of the routine of the house and my responsibilities towards all of them. I would shed the veneer of myself and put on a mask that pleased them.
Finally, the period of nine months was over. There was no sign of pain or impending delivery. My mother-in-law had to go out to attend a marriage. Though she could have easily refused, she decided to attend the marriage and left me in the hospital, perhaps, relying heavily on the nurses who were there to care for me. My mother had sent my younger brother to the hospital, thinking that his absence would strengthen me and he could be a great help if I needed anything.
When Vicky returned from his business tour, he stayed with us for ten days. The elders in the house had already begun to count days, ten months had passed but nothing had happened. I was back in the house.
They did not want to consult the doctor because they knew that he would advise them to go for caesarian.
They advised Vicky to go back to his business. How long it was going to take was not certain. According to them, Vicky’s wife was a brave woman and she could face the situation without him. Finally, he went back. He had never developed courage to disobey the commands of his father and his seven uncles. I did not want to put him in any kind of problem, so I did not force him to stay with me.
Two days after Vicky’s departure, one night I felt a little pain. I had heard that the pain would be intolerable but it was not so severe that night. The dinner had already been over and the other members of the family had already gone to bed.
I began to prepare for my journey to hospital. I kept little clothes, two bed sheets, and some other things in a basket. I did not sleep that night because the wave of pain erupted suddenly and it shook me for a while but then it receded and everything calmed down. I knew that it would not be possible to take a bath for a few days in the hospital, so I took bath at 4:00 am.
My elder sister-in-law entered the room and said, “It is too early to go to hospital. Prepare a cup of tea and keep walking.”
After her piece of advice she went back to sleep.
Somehow I passed two hours. The pain had increased and I could not remain standing. I entered my sister-in-law’s room and shook her. She opened her eyes and said, “Have you packed everything?”
Without waiting for my answer, she entered the bathroom.
At about 6:00 am, two of us were sitting in a taxi, running towards the hospital. She frightened me when she told me about a woman who had given birth to a child in a taxi. Thank God…nothing like that happened to me.
My younger brother was following us on his scooter. I remember my brother talking to Vicky.
“You had better stay with her, brother-in-law,” said my brother.
“You are here so I have no worries. Just give me a phone call and I will fly back,” said Vicky.
No one had phoned my husband.
In the morning, Vicky’s elder brother had said, “We should inform Vicky.”
“What will he do here?” butted in my elder sister-in-law, “now it is the matter of a few hours only. Once the son is born, we will inform him.”
When we reached the hospital, a nurse rushed towards me and took control. My brother began to fill the forms at the counter.
On right side, there was a hall with a few beds. There were three women crying in pain, their bulging tummies almost uncovered. They were half covered with green sheets. I was literally scared and I did not know what to do or what to say, for I knew, soon, I was going to be one of them.
A nurse said to my sister-in-law, “Change her clothes.” She handed her a green gown and pointed to the bathroom on the left side of the corridor.
“Remove your undergarments as well,” she added while I was about to disappear behind the door of the bathroom.
My condition was really bad; I wanted to urinate but it was impossible for me to sit. I changed my dress with a great difficulty and came back in to the hall. I was quite thirsty and I demanded water but, to my surprise, they refused to give me water. The nurse produced a wet cloth piece and rubbed them gently on my lips. My thirst increased. My sister-in-law went out to tell my brother to bring hot milk and tea.
The nurse examined me and said to my sister-in-law, “There is still a little time…”
She looked at me and said, “Is it your first child?”
I nodded.
“Where is your husband?” said the nurse.
“He is out of station,” answered my sister-in-law.
The nurse moved towards a woman who was almost ready for delivery. She lifted the sheet and touched her belly. The woman cried in pain.
“When you were doing this, you were enjoying, weren’t you?” said the nurse shamelessly.
The woman cried and said, “I won’t do it again!”
The other nurses standing near her began to laugh. The nurse who was handling the case seemed to be cruel and demonic. She was highly professional and there did not seem to be any trace of gentleness and motherly love.
She examined the size of my belly and said to my sister-in-law, “For first child the belly is bigger than usual. You rich people eat a lot of butter and ghee. If the child is excessively fat, how is it going to come out? Why do you eat so much?”
With her final question, she looked at me but I did not utter a word. I licked my dry lips with my almost parched tongue.
“Give her hot tea,” said the nurse as she was about to leave the room.
I caught hold of her hand and said, “I want to pass water.”
“Go to the bathroom!” she shot back.
“I can’t sit down…” I pleaded.
She looked in the direction of the other nurses and said, “Give her a pot.”
After a while a few doctors visited me and gave me two injections. I was quite exhausted and the pain was severe. I came to know that three babies had already been delivered in thirty five minutes since we had reached the hospital.
I was a witness of those magical moments during one such delivery. The darkness parted and then appeared a head. Then followed the body, blood, and water, as if a dam had been broken. Then the cord was cut off. The baby was blue. They hung it upside down and slapped it twice. The cries of the newborn filled the hall. It was a boy and smiles appeared on the faces of the relatives present there.
We had spent about six hours in the hospital but my turn had not come. I was dying with pain but no one paid attention to me.
At about 1:00 pm, a doctor examined me. I was running fever. He told my sister-in-law to rub my body with ice cubes.
The doctor checked my passage and said, “The passage is narrow and the size of the baby is bigger. We will have to perform an operation. Make preparations.”
“Who will sign?”
“I will sign,” said I, “but please do something quickly. I am dying of pain.”
“You can sign. You are her relative, aren’t you?” the doctor said to my sister-in-law.
“I can sign but please try for a normal delivery first,” said my sister-in-law.
A nurse brought a razor and shaving cream. She removed hair from the lower part of my body and tied a white cloth around my head. They gave me a white gown to wear. I understood that they were going to perform the operation. My sister-in-law signed the papers.
Suddenly, a senior doctor appeared from nowhere and examined me thoroughly.
“Spread your legs and try to push,” said he.
I was dying with pain but I tried to push. It was quite difficult because there was no strength left in me.
He was smiling and encouraging me, “Yes, push. Don’t mind the pain. Yes… I can see the head…keep on pushing…”
I got some encouragement and rallied my strength.
“Don’t stop, otherwise the baby will drink water… keep on pushing.”
I was crying in pain. A nurse and my sister-in-law held my arms tightly to the bed.
After about three minutes of struggle, I felt something slipping out of my body. Yes that was the moment. I had finally done it without operation.
When I heard my daughter’s cries, I felt relieved. There were smiles on the faces of the nurses but I sensed that my sister-in-law was not happy.
I told her to give me my purse. I gave some money to all the nurses present there. They were happy with the gift because they rarely got gifts after the birth of a female child.
In the evening, my husband, my mother-in-law, and my mother visited me. My husband was happy and he was kissing our daughter with all the love he had for his daughter. My mother-in-law did not show much enthusiasm and my mother sensed it too.
My mother had brought clothes and toys for the newborn baby. She was very happy.
“Next time it will be a boy. There is nothing to worry,” said my mother.
My mother-in-law looked at my mother, as if trying to find faults in her. She seemed to be complaining that her daughter had not given birth to a boy.
After my return, religious ceremonies were performed. People visited me and they admired the child.
When I was back on my feet, I found that something was missing. I did not find that happiness which I had become habitual to in that house over the period of three years.
Vicky tried to console me, “There is nothing to worry. Our next child will be a boy and then you will see they will all change.”
I began to remain confined to my room with my little daughter. They began to avoid me when they discussed something important in the house. My sister-in-law stopped sharing my bedroom when my husband went out of station.
After three years, I was back in the same hospital. The delivery was normal but the result was the same, a female child.
The second female child was the last straw for their disappointment. I began to feel like an outsider in that joint big family. When I could not bear it, I shed a few tears alone in my room in the presence of my daughters. They did not understand why their mother was crying.
One evening, I was stunned when I overheard this conversation:
“Vicky will never disobey me!” said my father-in-law.
“Yes, she can’t give him a son. If he waits, he will be old and we will have a few more girls in the house,” said my mother-in-law.
“Will he agree for second marriage?” said my father-in-law’s elder brother.
“He will have to agree, otherwise we will disinherit him from the property,” said my father-in-law.
I decided to talk to Vicky but then I thought about the consequences. If he agreed with his parents, I would be nowhere.
I wrote to my mother and she came to meet me. She gave me all the assurances I needed
The period of one year passed in this turmoil and mental agony. My first daughter had started going to school.
In the tenth year of our marriage, I conceived again. I had no courage left to face the consequences. My sister-in-law was not with me this time. They had informed my mother and she had made all the arrangements. I was deeply sad because no one from my husband’s house was there with me. I felt like an outcast, a stranger.
The delivery was normal and there was no enthusiasm on my face. I was sad, tired, and waiting.
“It’s a boy!” shouted a nurse.
Those words were the most beautiful words which I had ever heard. In spite of tiredness and pain, I jumped off the bed and stood up. I ran towards the cradle where my son was waiting for me.
My mother had tears in her eyes, the tears of joy, relief, and satisfaction. I knew that I was going to be someone very important in our big house.
After about one hour, mixed voices reached my ears. They had reached the hospital. My mother-in-law was leading the group. Their faces were smiling and they were joking with each other.
The room was filled with the gift packets.
Though I was able to retain my status in the family after the birth of my son, I felt something had died inside me. I realized that I had never found myself as an individual. I was nothing in the society where daughters and daughters-in-law are needed to produce heirs.
I don’t know why I love my daughters more than my son. I know I am because of him but my daughters need me more than he does. I have premonitions and I see my daughters going through the same process. I am sure that I don’t like this advanced and modern society which is always in the process of hiding the most heinous of the custom under the superficial veneer of civility and humanity. Isn’t their perfunctory politeness absolutely fake?
Chapter 3: She Met me Just Like That
“What are your plans now?”
“To look for a good job, what else?” Mac smiled vainly, knowing that it was not going to leave any impression on his friend.
“I will have to join my father’s business,” John expressed his disapproval through the gloomy face that he presented to Mac.
“You are a rich father’s son,” Mac tried to tease him.
“Twenty five years of studies gone down the drain. I will be selling garments to snobs in my father’s garment showroom.”
“You should consider yourself lucky because you won’t have to go from office to office to look for a job. Look at me, I will be doing that,” said Mac.
“My stop is here. See you tomorrow,” said John.
The bus stopped and John got down. He had promised Mac to meet the following day.
There is one significant thing which can’t be passed without notice; it is their names. Having joined M. B. A. course in Kathmandu University, they found that names Machhendra Nath Aryal and Jagannath Suwal were not going to fit in the friend circle which they had become part of. So Machhendra Nath Aryal became Mac and Jagannath became John. They were happy after their unofficial baptism. The effect was instant and they got rapid popularity in and around their campus.
“So now you are an M. B. A., what do you want to do now?” said Mac’s elder brother, Mr. Narendra Nath Aryal, a doctor by profession.
“I want to join a multi-national company,” said Mac.
“Yes, they are waiting for you, great Mr. Mac!” laughed his brother.
His brother often made fun of his high ambitions but he did not mind it. His brother had been looking after him in this town. Their old parents lived in the village. Mac had to depend on his brother for all his monetary demands.
“I will try my best and I am sure that my resume will impress them,” said Mac very confidently.
“Best of luck!”
“Brother, I need some money…”
“How much?”
“Just for bus fare etc.”
“All right,” said his brother and pulled a 500 Rs. Note from his pocket.
“Thanks, brother.”
It was Monday and Mac had been called by Infosys India Ltd. for an interview. He got dressed properly and put his documents in a folder and left the house.
When he reached the bus stop, he found that hundreds of people were waiting for the bus. However, he was sure that he would be able to jostle his way on to the very first bus. The bus was already crowded and there was no vacant seat. He moved towards the front of the bus. Fortunately, an old man got up from his seat and Mac hurriedly occupied the seat left by the old man. He looked at the co-passenger. He felt more than pleased when he found that the passenger sitting next to him was a beautiful girl, about twenty, in pink shirt and blue jeans pants. She had her shoulder bag in her lap.
“Hello,” smiled Mac.
The girl looked at him and gave a faint smile.
Mac began to make his surmises about the girl. She did not seem to be highly qualified because her reserved manners and shy demeanour suggested that she was subdued by seeing a gentleman, wearing a tie and a black coat, carrying a folder in his hand.
He had to pass about an hour with her so he broke the ice, “You are going to office?”
“Yes.”
He guessed that she could be a receptionist or a salesgirl in a shop. There were a few tricks which he had learned in the hostel of his college. He was sure that if he asked she would not refuse. He wanted to borrow her mobile phone so that he could see her phone number. But before he could execute his adventurous idea, the girl said, “Do you have a mobile with you?”
Mac was taken aback but he controlled himself and stammered, “Y..e…s…”
“I have to make a phone call. May I use your phone?” she smiled and this time Mac noticed that this smile had something which forced his right hand to his front pocket to pull his mobile out.
“Yes.”
“Thank you,” said the girl, taking the mobile.
She dialed the number and waited. After a while she spoke, “Hello, Jimmy, this is Sunita. Did you call my brother?”
“…………..”
“I had told you not to call my brother,” said she.
“…………”
“This is not my mobile. You call me on this number. I am waiting,” said she and disconnected the line.
Before Mac could say something, the phone rang.
“Yes, I had told you not to call my brother. I don’t want to see you anymore. Don’t try to call me or meet me. Goodbye!” she almost shouted.
She returned the phone to Mac. He could see that she was furious and the smile had disappeared from her face.
Mac was sure that she had broken with her boyfriend. He was sure that the girl did not belong to a higher class of the society, for the manner in which she had scolded the caller was not normal with the elite class of people.
He did not want to make any further move. He kept his phone in his pocket and began to look in front.
“Do you work somewhere?”
Mac was startled, “No, I am looking for a job.”
“You look educated. What kind of job do you want?” said the girl.
Mac did not want to continue the conversation because he did not want to condescend from his high throne of M. B. A. to the standard of a common office girl.
“What happened? You did not answer,” said the girl.
“Any job, I am ready to do any work,” said Mac.
“Are you going for an interview?”
“Yes,” said Mac with a faint smile.
“Do you want to work in a call centre?” said the girl.
“How much do they pay?” said Mac.
“Enough to afford a car and an apartment of your own,” smiled the girl.
“I might try someday,” said Mac without much enthusiasm. He an M. B. A. from Kathmandu University working at a call centre was really a highly ridiculous.
He was quite surprised that even his impressive attire and highly polished manners had not helped him to raise him higher than a man working in a call centre in the eyes of the girl. He was annoyed because this common looking girl had dared to challenge his integrity and education. He was burning with anger; however, he did not say a single word.
The bus stopped and they got down. The girl turned to him and gave him a visiting card. Without reading it, he kept it in his pocket.
“By the way, if you ever think of joining a call centre, call me. I am in a hurry. This morning, my car broke down and I did not get a taxi so I had to take this bus,” smiled the girl and hailed a passing taxi.
She boarded the taxi and disappeared.
Everything had happened so suddenly that Mac did not get even a second to speak to her further. Her departure, in that grand manner, had troubled him a lot and he felt that all his surmises about the girl were baseless fancies.
He pulled the card out and began to read carefully:
Sunita Pundit
Personal Officer
Infosys India Ltd.
Kathmandu Branch
Ph: 9808989876
Mac felt as if he had been hurled down to the ground from the heights which he believed were insurmountable. How was he going to face her in her office, the office of the Personal Officer?
His legs were shaking and he began to perspire. His hands were shaking while trying to hold the visiting card steadily. He was about to put the card back in his pocket when he suddenly looked at the back of the card. A broad smile appeared on his face, for the words written there were the most appealing that he had ever read:
My personal number: 9809475847
Call me if you want a job.
He laughed and cancelled the idea of going for the interview. He hailed the taxi and in a few moments the taxi was running towards John’s shop. Now, he was the only one to guide him further in the matter as faced.
Chapter 4: Blood Relation
I was in the lawn, riding my new bicycle brought by my grandfather on my tenth birthday. My grandmother and grandfather were giving a bath to our dog ‘Wolf’ in the backyard.
Suddenly, I saw auntie, coming towards me.
“What are you doing here so early in the morning?” she smiled, “Look, I have brought a new pair of trousers and a jacket for you.” She had a gift wrapped packet in her hand.
I was delighted because birthdays happen to be very special and I get many gifts. I took the packet and ran inside the house, leaving my cycle in the lawn.