Analogy of My Heart
Volume 1
By Mia Castile
Published by Entwined Publishing
Copyright 2011
License Notes
Smashwords edition
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Table of Content
First, I would like to thank God for blessing me with my family and friends. Second, I would like to thank my wonderful husband. Mano, everything that I do, I do for us. I love you. To my darlings, Sofi and Benji, I love you and am so proud to be your mama. Grandma and Chasadee, thank you for the support over the years, reading my poetry, and encouraging me to continue writing.
I’d like to thank my close friends, "the inner circle," for being there for me and standing by me all these years. You know who you are, and how much you mean to me.
I’d like to thank Brooke for helping me put this compilation together. Kristina as always, your support and inspiration help drive me forward on this journey.
Finally I’d like to thank you the reader for taking the time to support me. It moves me to a new depth of gratitude when I hear that my writing had touched someone.
My Love
My first love, you were so fresh and new,
Everything was a fairy tales, but untrue.
I loved you before I knew what Love was,
And that ultimately destroyed us.
Rebound love, I think what hurt worse,
We were doomed from the beginning, a curse.
I loved you because I wanted it to be easy,
I thought I could love you, and live carelessly.
Forbidden love, you enticed me too much,
I would have turned away everything for such,
A beautiful idea, a place we could go together.
Instead of secret meetings in dark alleys during winter.
Eternal love, you’ve grown old and grey,
And still I love you more every day.
We embarked on a journey that led us here,
The everlasting struggle day to day, but love is near.
Perfect
The perfect place, the perfect hair.
The perfect face, perfect things to wear.
A plastic heaven for those who dwell,
A shallow haven for them to swell.
A bumpy face, with straggly hair,
The worse place for awful things to wear.
A plastic heaven where no one looks too deep.
A shallow haven where my fears always creep.
People here only search for glamour,
But never sink their teeth into the core.
I dwell here with many alone,
With no soul mate all of my own.
People here only see my outside,
Never discover my inside.
I dwell in a perfect place,
I cannot escape my perfect fate.
Whisper
Whisper when the shouting stops.
When the screaming is no more.
Whisper where the silence dwells,
Where loudness doesn’t roar.
Whisper in the quiet night.
So no one else can hear.
Whisper all your silent cares,
Tell your greatest fears.
Whisper when you are alone,
In the silent, quiet places.
Where sanity is but a stone,
And madness knows no faces.
Dirty Laundry
It’s time to do my dirty laundry.
It’s time to separate the darks from the lights.
It’s time to put aside the things I need to have now,
From the things that can wait for later.
It’s time to do my dirty laundry.
Scarred
Scarred with wounds so deep
Discolored, disfigured just like a creep.
People pretend that I am not here
So they don’t have to face their fear.
Scarred with wounds so painful and fresh,
If shown to the world I’m sure to impress.
I wish to be loved, adored, and lovely
But the scars that I bear make me so ugly.
Scarred with wounds so deep they hurt,
Emotionally I feel lower than dirt,
No one I know could ever bear my pain,
So all my suffering, is suffering in vain.
Your Pedestal
Are your feet tired?
From standing
On that pedestal so high.
So high,
That pedestal.
Don’t fall.
Don’t fall
Down and
Hurt yourself.
Yourself,
Is who you blame
For all of my imperfections.
My imperfections
Will be
Your downfall.
Your downfall
Is so far
From your pedestal so high.
Can you
See me
From your pedestal?
Your pedestal
You chose
To stand on,
Standing there,
All
By yourself.
Yourself,
Is who you blame
For all of my shortcomings.
My shortcomings,
Will be
The end of us.
The end of us
Will be your fault
Because you stand on a pedestal.
Little Pushes
I’m so tired of the lying,
Tired of the crying,
Tired of making up excuses.
You wonder why I’m sad,
I wonder why we had,
To come so far with little pushes.
I wish I could tell you,
Wish I could show you,
Do you know that your my hero?
And you roll your eyes at me,
Making me feel silly,
I wish there was a way to show you.
I’m so tired of pretending,
Tired of depending,
On you to make up your mind.
You kiss me with a sigh,
And you tell me not to cry.
Is there middle ground we can find?
Shadows and Sunlight
Empty promises made,
Endless dreams that disappeared
If only you’d have stayed,
I’d have no more to fear.
I hold onto the good times
And pray to God you’d realize
I’ll forget all the bad times,
I’ll forget all your lies.
The dark night is where I dwell,
In the shadows I linger long,
For in the bright sun I fell,
And cried to you “It’s all wrong”.
I held onto the good times
And prayed to God you’d realized
I’d forgotten all the bad times,
And I’d forgotten all of your lies.
Maybe someday, in the sunlight I’ll play
For my childhood was robbed.
Maybe someday, I’ll let you stay
And tell you of all the years I sobbed.
Shadows and sunlight come and go,
Happiness will never stay.
Which is better? I don’t know,
But for your mistakes, I’ve had to pay.