Frankie’s Story: Accomplishment Personified
By Dorothy Scarfone and Michael R Basso
Smashwords Edition 1.0
Copyright © 2011 By Dorothy Scarfone and Michael R Basso
Dedicated to the late Frank Scarfone, Sr.
May his soul continue to inspire his son in the ways that he knows best.
Frankie
Leading Karate Class – February, 2011
Contents
About the Authors
Forward
Preface
The Mayor
The Views of Others
Frankie’s Interests
The Early Years
Challenges and Rewards
Computer Learning
Learning Music
Music Therapy
The Special Olympics
Tournaments and West Point
Frankie’s view of the Induction
Appendix One: Accomplishments
Appendix Two: The Neurobiology of DS
Appendix Three: Article about DS
Appendix Four: Miscellaneous
Appendix Five: Parental Resources
Appendix Six: Media Stories
Poem
Other Relevant Books by Authors
About
the Authors
Dorothy lives in New York with Frankie who has Down Syndrome. She has a daughter, Sandra, another son, Mark, and four grandchildren. Dorothy earned an Associates Degree at the Latin-American Institute in Manhattan and her paralegal certificate at Manhattanville College. She now works as a legal secretary/paralegal for a law firm in Greenwich, Connecticut.
Dorothy was a literacy volunteer for many years starting when her children were in elementary school. She has continued to volunteer to teach English to the new wave of immigrants in her native village, Port Chester, New York. She also had been a member of the parish counsel of her church helping to establish goals for the parish. Presently, she is on a committee at her church which reaches out to the elderly. She was also a member of the Board of Directors of Don Bosco Community Center in Port Chester, NY.
Dorothy is also on the Board of Directors of the Tamarack Tower Foundation in Port Chester, NY as well as corresponding secretary for the TTF. She is also on the Board of Directors of the South East Consortium for Special Services, Inc., located in Mamaroneck, NY.
Michael has written several children’s books with a focus upon teaching children and significant others about people with disabilities. Michael has written several articles for the Yale Journal for the Humanities in Medicine and others for professional Journals in the area of neuroscience. Dr. Basso has also written more that 150 newspaper articles in the realm of Holistic Health and Wellness.
Michael R. Basso has significant experience as an educator in psychology at Yale University and the University of Connecticut, and as a leader in quality and reliability engineering and management in industry. His experience also includes being a consultant, a medical researcher, and a newspaper columnist. Michael is the president of the Connecticut Holistic Health Association.
Dr. Basso has a Ph.D. in professional psychology and biomedical systems, an MS in engineering science, an MBA with a focus in executive leadership and an interdisciplinary Professional Development Diploma in pathophysiology, neural systems, and education. He also holds a BS in electrical engineering. Michael is certified in quality and reliability engineering and quality auditing, as well as variety of health related areas.
Forward
By Dr. Michael Basso
I had not seen Cousin Dorothy for a while and decided to stop by for a visit. Since she had had some work done on her front porch I proceeded to walk around the house to use the back porch door. Suddenly, I started to get tense. My God, little Frankie was now very much grown up and a fourth degree black belt and I’m walking around his back yard unannounced – what would he do if he didn’t recognize this intruder walking on his mom’s property. Even though he was always an even tempered and kind soul, the thought of what he was capable of instantly gave me the utmost respect for Frankie.
In a flash, I was keenly aware of how much Frankie had accomplished over the years.
Next my mind raced back to 1960s and Sunday afternoons at Granny’s house. She was the best cook ever and a comedian in her own right. All the aunts and uncles would congregate around the kitchen table for the unending treats that Granny would provide. From pancakes with VT maple syrup, to squash flower potato patties, to every Italian and American delight ever invented and every kind of dessert on the planet; you name it, Granny had it.
It was like yesterday when I remember how sad I felt when one of my favorite relatives, Uncle Nick, Dottie’s dad, started to come to Granny’s house with a cane. How strange it was that Aunt Grace, Dorothy’s mom, suddenly had to do all the driving. Seeing her have to walk him from the car to the house was shocking to say the least. To see my hero, Uncle Nick, in a wheel chair was like knowing that superman couldn’t fly any more.
Uncle Nick had the coolest coin and stamp collections and ‘wow;’ that .22 target rifle that he would show me from time to time, really made my day. When I was real good he would give me a special coin; Indian Head Pennies, Liberty Dimes – how cool was that. Not as cool as Uncle Nick.
Uncle Nick and Aunt Grace lived in a two family house with Uncle Nick’s dad; and Dottie and Frank Sr. lived upstairs. Mr. Sabia, Dottie’s grandfather, was a character in his own right, with the thickest handlebar mustache I had ever seen.
Over the years Uncle Nick’s neuro-muscular disease got progressively worse and poor Aunt Grace had her hands full with him. As time went on, Dorothy and Frank helped out as well.
Soon Sandy came along and then Frankie and after that Frankie’s brother Mark.
I remember my mom talking about Frankie. It was soon clear how retarded Frankie was and how much my mom, Dorothy’s aunt Emily, and my aunt Grace, were concerned about Dorothy.
In those days it was common for kids with Down Syndrome to be taken from their parents to be put away in state homes. Dottie and Frank would have nothing to do with that and spoil little Frankie they did.
And teach Frankie they did as well; and teach and teach and teach. Dottie was like a saint. My mom, who was very close to Dorothy’s kids, would tell me story after story about Frankie’s accomplishments in school, in sports and even in music.
When the Special Olympics came out, Frankie was there. It blew me away when he learned to play the guitar – wow!
The little apartment that they had was eventually too small to live in and they bought a house two towns away.
Dottie and Frank still helped out with Uncle Nick and when Aunt Grace died things got even more stressful for my cousins. They would have to be there for him at night before bed and first thing in the morning; he would have nothing to do with leaving his childhood home and accommodate him they did – even though they lived two towns apart.
Why so much about Uncle Nick?
Well, Uncle Nick was a fighter and never gave up; much like his grandson. He started his own home office and tax business, swam at the Y several days per week and spent lots and lots of time with Dottie’s kids. What a great influence and inspiration Frankie’s grandfather must have been on Frankie.
But Frankie was mentally challenged and I often thought about what a burden it must have been for Dorothy and Frank. Were they embarrassed at the stigma of having a mentally challenged child? They never seemed to be; ever.
When our cousin Gracie would take us all to Westchester Country club beach club, I thought, ‘gee what if my affluent friends would see me with my second cousin who obviously was mentally challenged.’
Perhaps God taught me a lesson. No, I was given a blessing. No disguised blessing. It was right there for me and my high school and lifeguard buddies to see. Since I was a certified lifeguard, I was asked to take charge of Frankie at the pool of this affluent country club.
I soon got over my fears and started to see Frankie more for what he really was; an intelligent, creative and determined young soul who somehow was given a defective nervous system to work with.
Even with the genetic defects present, there was something special about Frankie as anyone could see when they looked into his eyes.
Was he a special spiritual being given the task of overcoming the physical part of existence? Who knows?
What is for certain is that with an IQ of far less than 100, Frankie was able to do things that very few ‘normal’ people could accomplish.
As a Yale trained neuroscience person with a psychology and engineering background, I naturally pondered about what happened to make Frankie so accomplished.
I also noticed the look on Dot’s face when she was asked about the fact that many Down people have Alzheimer’s Disease when in their 40’s. At 44 Frankie is still sharp as a tack, with exquisite short and long term memory. He recently proved the integrity of his procedural memory to me when he described in great detail the special requirements for infant CPR. Also, he had to memorize over 400 intricate Karate moves to pass his 4th degree black belt qualifications. This rank is also called the fourth Don in Tae Kwon Do – making him a Master in that style of Karate.
When Dot asked his karate master if he gave Frankie any breaks due to his ‘condition’ the teacher replied with a ‘definitely not.’ This attitude was supported by Grand Master Sun, “No concessions,” the esteemed master stated in no uncertain terms.
Dot is still a very protective and sometimes stern mom. For instance, just before we finished this first edition of this manuscript, Frankie walked home from somewhere during a cold winter night without a coat. She laid into him like any concerned mom might do – albeit he was 44 at the time! I do believe that her strict discipline in the form of tough love has and had lots to do with Frankie’s accomplishments.
What inner motivational factors and innate goals did Frankie share in common with Uncle Nick and Dorothy? Were there genetic factors involved and/or social ones that caused Frankie’s nervous system to rewire itself and give him a ‘refurbished’ brain? In particular, which of Dorothy’s behaviors did Frankie’s mirror neuron system mimic and why? Karate and music therapy certainly had lots to do with things as well.
This is the story of how Dorothy, Frank, and the kids, Uncle Nick, Aunt Grace and Frankie’s many teachers turned a ‘tragedy’ into success as an inspiration for all parents, grand parents, and siblings, with special kids, or brothers and sisters, and much, much more – an inspiration for anyone with disabilities and their families.
More than that; I no longer think of Frankie as disabled in many ways. Frankie is an inspiration for anybody, anywhere who wants to succeed at anything!
Preface
By Dorothy Scarfone
Frank Louis Scarfone, Jr. was a 44-year-old with Down Syndrome at the time of this writing.
On January 17, 2010 he was inducted into the International Martial Arts Hall of Fame at a black tie affair at Madison Square Garden in New York City. Frankie is the only known martial artist with Down Syndrome in the country who has attained the level of Fourth Degree Black Belt in Tae Kwon Do. He has also participated in numerous karate tournaments.
Family and friends are very proud of these major accomplishments as well as many others.
Frankie's roles in the family as son, brother, and uncle have been very welcomed. He has an older sister, a younger brother, three nieces and one nephew. At times when growing up, his brother and sister were often torn between love and empathy for Frankie, who candidly could be quite vexing at times, but Frankie’s charm always won them over. His brother and sister vacillated between being his best friend and being embarrassed about having an unusual brother. Fortunately, love always won.
Frankie has always been very outgoing, loveable and personable - not in-your-face loveable; but loveable nonetheless. He is a celebration of the human spirit with an inner strength that we could all learn from.
My son was always blessed with teachers who were dedicated and creative in their approach and an extremely supportive extended family.
Against all medical projections, he has not stopped learning as we were told he would. Frankie loves the computer and has learned to use the internet and e-mail. Frankie has learned to play the electronic keyboard. He has been taking lessons and has achieved a degree of proficiency. Frankie derives great pleasure from music and it is something that he will enjoy the rest of his life. Frankie has participated in numerous Special Olympic events even going to the state semi-finals once or twice. He is also involved in many recreational activities including bowling and weight lifting. He can bench press more 300 pounds.
While he continues to increase proficiency in these areas, karate is his passion.
What has been especially important and exciting to him is that he has been learning karate for the past 25± years. As Frankie progressed in Tae Kwon Do, his abilities to read, write, do math, etc. progressed as well. He honed his ability to read and play music. I believe that the karate helped to create new pathways in his brain enabling him to learn more than is usually expected of a child with Down Syndrome.
Frankie is an altar server at our church and volunteers at our church's summer camp for needy children.
Frankie had worked as a teacher's aide in a school for special children for 21 years working with children with special needs. The downturn of the economy caused him to be laid off from this job. However, not to be idle, Frankie has been volunteering at our church Food Pantry ever since. Since his father passed away, Frankie has indeed been a pillar of strength for me. He lives at home and is a great help around the house.
There is also a mischievous side to Frankie that demonstrates his tenacity, wit and charm all at once.
Recently, I took a mini-vacation. Frankie and I both needed a break from each other. Frankie spent the week with his brother, Mark. Mark and his wife, Rebecca, both had to work. We all agreed that Frankie would be fine alone during the day. I just wanted to be sure someone was with him at night. Mark arranged for Frankie to obtain a week’s pass to the local gym to which he would be able to walk. This was great. Frankie loved the gym and the independence his brother allowed him.
On the first night at Mark’s, Frankie ordered wrestling “pay-per-view” to the tune of $50.00. Mark reluctantly accepted the $50.00 that Frankie had in his wallet as payment. When Mark called me and told me that he didn’t want to accept the money, I said that he should. This would teach Frankie not to take hospitality for granted. However, now Frankie had no money to spend on his breakfasts, lunches, etc. because $50.00 was all he had in his wallet. I told Mark that Frankie had his bank card in his wallet and suggested that Mark take him to an ATM to get some spending money. I gave Mark Frankie’s pin number. Mark, however, just told Frankie to go to the ATM machine that was next door to the gym. Frankie had never taken money out before alone but he sure did figure it out.
First he took out $40.00; then it looked like a pretty good idea so he immediately took out another $100.00. Wow, this is some machine, he must have thought. You just push the buttons and it gives you money. The next day he went back and took out $200.00. I secretly laughed when I reviewed his statement upon my return from vacation. I could just picture his face when all that money came out of the ATM. He must have thought he hit the jackpot in Atlantic City. I had to put on a serious face when I told him that in order to get money out, you have to put money in the machine; and, since he has no job, guess who puts the money in his account. This impressed him - I hope.
“In sum, I could not imagine life without Frankie,” Dorothy says.
Throughout Harrison, he is affectionately known as “The Mayor” because of his friendliness and involvement in so many aspects of community life. He is very inspiring to everyone around him. “
The Mayor
One hot sunny Sunday the whole family decided to go to our town pool for a swim. However, since we had newly arrived in town, we were unaware that we needed identification in order to gain admittance to the pool. We had left our IDs at home. We were ready for an argument at the gate to the pool when suddenly Frankie appeared from behind us. Upon seeing Frankie, the young man at the gate said, “Oh, you’re with Frankie? Go right in.” From that moment on Frankie was known as the mayor of Harrison. Wherever we went someone knew Frankie and greeted him accordingly. He had carte blanche at our local recreation center and was able to walk there from our home. I was so proud that Frankie was such a friendly kid (he was only ten at the time that we moved to town), and that everyone knew him.