The Day We Joked About The Dead.
Raymond Daley
Copyright 23/1/12 by Raymond Daley
Smashwords Edition
George Romero once said in one of his famous zombie movies "When there is no more room in hell, the dead will walk the Earth".
This was something he imagined.
Little did he know how true it would become.
We live.
We are the walking live.
The unundead.
The living. In this world we are a minority.
More people have died and been buried than are currently alive.
And the Nanonecrovirus reanimated all the dead.
Nanotechnology had been implemented to fight all known viri. Some fool had chosen to use it in bacteriological warfare. The nanites were engineered to kill necrotic cancer cells, or to specifically target AIDS infected cells.
Somehow these nanites were mutated and no longer served their original purpose. Now they made the dead alive.
Every corpse that had ever been buried came back to life and rose from the dead.
And not just the human ones either.
Undead dogs and cats aren't cute, let me tell you that for nothing.
We
were grateful for the small mercy that was all zoos cremate dead
animals. No-one wanted to imagine an undead crocodile or lion,
pissed off and set to kill.
Fortunately for us they don't share the same taste for human flesh or brains that Romero’s nightmares all did.
They merely hate us for our existence and want to kill us all.
Again it is our good fortune that at this time in human history we destroy more of our dead by cremation than at any other period in time. Those who have burned can not return.
The undead can not feel pain. Nor do they get bored, or tired, or need to stop to feed. They merely continue in their single pursuit, the genocide of the living.
If anything they have more in common with The Terminator than any nightmare Romero ever created.
We set traps, mainly holes which we dig then cover. The dead may be inhuman in their pursuit of us but they aren't all that bright.
The lights are off and there's nobody home.
When we trap them in holes and pits we do the one thing we know will ensure they don't return. We set them on fire.
We try to pit them in groups, it's no use merely trapping one or two. It's much easier and more economical on fuel to trap a fairly large group of around twenty.
We shelter where we can, anywhere with a fairly heavy metal door and thick concrete walls is a good option. You don't want to be somewhere with a dirt floor.
The dead know how to dig. Nothing stops them. We learned that when they rose from their graves. Only the ones in lead lined coffins struggled.
So now we wander the Earth trying to survive.
But we try to maintain a sense of humour about things.
Only the other day we were in the cemetery checking there were no recent emergences. Emergences. That's what we call it when they rise from the grave.
Max said "Listen".
I looked at him "What, I can't hear a damn thing?"
Max grinned and replied "Exactly! Quiet as the grave".
I shot him THAT look. You can't teach THAT look. It's ingrained into the genetic make-up and you'll not only recognise it instantly but you'll also know exactly when it's the right time to use it.
Quiet as the grave was one of the things that had long since ceased to be funny.
The only quiet graves were now empty ones. Ones you were one hundred percent certain of their emptiness.
Max tried to instantly redeem himself. "Sorry bud. I screwed up. I'm dead tired".
A silence of a fraction of a second passed between us again. I couldn't help but grin at that one.
As we wandered through the falling darkness someone tried to pull off a joke about the dead of night. It crashed and burned not only because it was too early but because the dead were a lot worse at night than they were during the day.
As we were trying to find a safe house we found ourselves at the very edge of the cemetery. One of the guys pointed out a headstone.
'Not dead, only sleeping' it read.
"God, I hope not!" we all laughed together.
We are the living. We will try to survive.
________________________________________________________________Authors Notes:-
This one was sparked by 2 ideas, zombie animals and the silly headstone message at the end that couldn't be more wrong if it tried.
For those too lazy to Google? The Romero quote comes from Dawn Of The Dead.
This one was delayed for a couple of reasons.
1) I felt it needed a little bit more than it already had.
2) I hadn't sorted a cover when I finished it.