EROTICON 1
Introduced and edited by
J-P SPENCER
Eroticon 1 published in 1985 & 2001 by Nexus. Published as an eBook in 2011 by Avid eBooks.
Smashwords Edition
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This novel is fiction - in real life practice safe sex.
This eBook is sold subject to the condition that it shall not, by way of trade or otherwise, be lent, resold, hired out or otherwise circulated without the publisher’s prior written consent in any form of binding or cover other than that in which it is published, and without a similar condition being imposed on the subsequent purchaser. The characters and situations in this eBook are entirely imaginary and bear no relation to any real person or actual happening.
Copyright J-P Spencer. The right of J-P Spencer to be identified as author of this book has been asserted in accordance with section 77 and 78 of the Copyrights Designs and Patents Act 1988.
The Amatory Experiences of a Surgeon
Confessions of an English Maid
Eroticon is an anthology of excerpts from nineteenth century texts whose specific intention is to titillate the sexual imagination. Whether this is a worthy aim is not the principal issue here, but all of us have our moments of passion and most of us would admit there are times when the flesh must have its due. It was the purpose of the writers whose work is enclosed - most of them anonymous, most of them long dead - to capture the earthy magic of erotic frenzy and bottle it, as it were, for wider consumption. This is not an easy task and in erotica, more than in any other genre, success is in the mind of the reader - one man's wildly stimulating encounter is another's squalid pantomime. Yet it is a tribute to the peculiar power of this material that no matter how puerile, or how monomaniacal, erotic writing exerts considerable fascination for many readers. In an era when photographs, videos and movies are readily available why should anyone want to read prolix, quaint, silly, sexual fantasies written generations ago? Yet people do. Underground pornography of any claim to literacy - as opposed to rank illiteracy - lives on, and it is a bet that many of the works included in this collection outlive today's bestsellers, just as they did those of our grandparents' era.
Few of the authors whose work is collected here can be precisely identified. Memoirs of a Young Don Juan is undoubtedly the work of the poet Guillaume Apollinaire (1880-1918) who, like many other French literary figures such as Theophile Gautier and Alfred de Musset, wrote erotic work. The novel is a tender and honest account of a man's sexual awakening and is generally considered to have an autobiographical basis. Apollinaire also translated Pauline the Prima Donna into French from its original German. Though purportedly the memoirs of a famous German diva, Wilhelmine Schroeder-Devrient, it is not accepted that the singer beloved of Beethoven, Wagner and Goethe was herself responsible for this salacious account of her life.
The only other author who can be identified here is James Campbell Reddie, a Scots bibliophile and translator whose Amatory Experiences of a Surgeon was first published in 1881, years after his death. Though Teleny or The Reverse of the Medal has often been credited to Oscar Wilde, authorities such as Patrick J. Kearney discount the assertion. Nevertheless, according to Kearney's excellent account, A History of Erotic Literature, Wilde was familiar with the novel and was also instrumental in circulating the manuscript in London in 1890. Given the nature of the work - it describes a passionate liaison between two men, driven by obsessive lust and dogged by guilt and jealousy - it is not surprising that its creation should be credited to the Irish dramatist.
An obsessive relationship is also at the heart of The English Governess but of a very different nature to that described in Teleny. The point of the novel is not the description of conventional sexual activity but its scenes of flagellation, the application of pain being an integral part of the growing bond between the beautiful but stern governess and the adolescent boy in her charge. It may be of some comfort to readers who see no place for the birch and the martinet in romance to learn that the two protagonists finish the novel by getting married!
Of the twentieth century selections included here, two are by the same hand - the pseudonymous Marcus Van Heller, who is responsible for The Loins of Amon and The House of Borgia. The settings, however, are in no sense contemporary. This is costume drama at its steamiest and though no great literary claims can be made for it the effect is as compulsive as a TV soap opera.
Undoubtedly the most extraordinary work quoted amongst this miscellany of extracts is Walter's My Secret Life. Unlike the other source material - excepting possibly Teleny and The English Governess - it was not written for money. Unlike the others it is not a work of fiction. Here is the most complete, the most exhaustive, sexual autobiography one would ever wish to encounter, first published around 1890 in eleven volumes (including a bizarre index which runs from 'Abortion' and 'Abstinence from women, mine' to 'Zora, French harlot' - it is a remarkable piece of work in its own right). The precise identity of the Victorian author is unknown, though the authorities on the subject have their theories and, indeed, much has been written on all aspects of this unique book (see below for suggested further reading). Whoever Walter may have been, the secret sex diary he began to write in his mid-twenties, and which he continued throughout a full life, is now perceived as 'a document of the most profound importance' (Kearney). In the United Kingdom and what are known as the traditional Commonwealth publishing territories it is only available in a severely abbreviated one volume edition. The extracts quoted here from that part of the work which is unavailable in the British publishing territories and follow the course of Walter's encounters with the young and beautiful Helen whom he meets towards the end of his epic amatory career. Their relationship progresses from that of prostitute and client to a lustful friendship in which both parties are keen to plumb the depths of each other's sexual curiosity.
Readers must bear in mind that this anthology is simply a selection of excerpts from texts which exist in their own right and it cannot hope to give more than a flavour of the work in question. By its nature, however, erotic writing is inevitably episodic and lends itself to treatment in this way. Eroticon presents a necklace of literary jewels, some flawed, some gaudy and vulgar, some achingly beautiful, yet each glittering with the power of its own sensual character.
J-P Spencer
You must have found me very serious as you read the end of my last letter, but that is just another trait of my character. I always seem to be able to foresee the way a chain of events will unroll, and take into account the various impressions, feelings and experiences that go to make it up. Even the most violent intoxication of the senses has never been able to make me lose my critical facilities, and today, in fact, I am beginning a chapter of my confessions which will prove this statement.
My affair with Franz continued. I was always very prudent and so my aunt suspected nothing, and our rendezvous were secret from all those around us. In addition, I refused to be alone with Franz more than once a week. The day of my debut was drawing near and Franz was becoming more and more rash. He thought he had obtained some rights over me, and he was becoming too domineering, like all men who believe themselves sure of an undisputed possession, but this was not how I intended it to be, and I immediately conceived a plan. At the beginning of a brilliant career was I to connect myself with a man of no importance, one to whom I was, on all points, superior? To leave him on bad terms, however, would have been dangerous, for I would then be at the mercy of his indiscretion. It was necessary to be very clever, which I was, for I succeeded in ending our liaison so opportunely and so deceptively that Franz still believes today that if chance had not separated us I would certainly have married him.
The 'chance' was my doing. I had informed my professor that my accompanist had pursued me with his declarations and that I was ready to break off the course of my artistic career in exchange for love in a cottage. However, the good man, who was extremely proud of his pupil and who was counting heavily on my debut, grew very angry. I begged him not to make Franz miserable, and so I reached my goal while Franz reached the Budapest Theatre Orchestra by special engagement. We bade each other a tender farewell; I had broken off my relations without anything to fear.
Shortly after our separation I gave my first performance at the Theatre of the Karntnertor, and you know how successful it was. I was more than happy. I was surrounded and besieged. Applause, money and celebrity poured my way and I had plenty of suitors, admirers and enthusiasts. Some thought to reach their aim with poems and some with valuable presents, but I had already observed that an artist cannot give in to his vanity or his feeling without risking everything in the game. This is why I pretended to be indifferent. I discouraged all those who came near me and soon acquired the reputation of a woman of unassailable virtue. Nobody had any idea that after Franz's departure I turned again to my solitary joys on Sunday evenings and to the delights of the hot bath. However, I never yielded more than once a week to the call of my senses, although they demanded much more. A thousand eyes were upon me and so I was extremely prudent in my relationships. My aunt had to go everywhere with me and nobody could accuse me of a single indiscretion.
This lasted all winter long. I had a steady income, and I installed myself in a very comfortable and well-furnished apartment. I was accepted in the best society and found myself very happy with my new life. I only regretted rarely Franz's departure, and fortunate circumstances compensated me for it the following summer.
I had been introduced into the house of one of the richest bankers in Vienna, and I received from his wife all of the marks of the truest friendship. Her husband had paid court to me, hoping with his huge fortune to easily conquer a popular actress. When he had been driven away like all the others, he introduced me to his household, thinking to win me that way. Thus it came about that I could come and go there as I pleased. I consistently repulsed his advances and, perhaps because of that, his wife soon became my most intimate friend. Roudolphine, for that was her name, was about twenty-seven years old, a piquant brunette, very vivacious, lively, tender and very much a woman. She had no children and was quite indifferent to her husband, of whose misdemeanours she was painfully aware. The relationship between them was friendly, and they did not refuse themselves from time to time the joys of marriage. Yet, in spite of all, it was not a happy union. Her husband probably did not realise that she was a very warm-blooded woman, a fact she most likely concealed very skilfully.
At the approach of the fine weather, Roudolphine went to live in a charming villa at Baden where her husband used to visit her regularly every Sunday, bringing a few friends with him. She invited me to spend the summer there with her at the end of the theatre season. This stay in the country was to do me a lot of good. Until then we had only talked about clothes, music and art, but now our conversation began to assume a different character. The court that her husband paid to me provided her the opportunity for this. I noticed that she measured her husband's misbehaviour according to the privations which he imposed upon her. Her complaints were so sincere, and she hid so little the object of her regret, that I immediately concluded that I had been chosen as her confidant and decided to act like a simple and inexperienced friend. I had played my cards right and touched upon her weakness; she at once began to explain things to me, and the more innocent I pretended to be and the more I seemed astounded by what she told me, the more she insisted on fully informing me of what filled her heart.
In addition, she took great pleasure in revealing certain physical matters to me. She was utterly astounded at the surprise I showed at discovering these things. She could not believe that a young artist who was always playing with fire could be so unaware of everything. It was only the fourth day after my arrival when we took a bath together - practical instruction could hardly be left out after so many fine speeches - and the more I appeared clumsy and self- conscious, the more amusement she derived from exercising a novice. The• more difficulties I made, the more passionate she grew. However, in the bath and during the day she did not dare go beyond certain familiarities, and I realised that she was going to employ all of her cunning to persuade me to spend the night with her. The memory of the first night spent in Marguerite's bed obsessed me in such a way that I was quite ready to yield to her wish. I did this with such a show of ingenuousness that she was more and more convinced of my innocence. She thought she was seducing me, but it was I who was getting my way.
She had the most charming bedroom, furnished with all the luxuries that only a wealthy banker can afford, and with all the taste of a room arranged for a wedding night. It was there that Roudolphine had become a woman. She recounted in detail her experience and what had been her feeling when the flower of her innocence had been taken. She made no secret of the fact that she was very sensual. She also told me that until her second confinement she had never found any pleasure in her husband's embraces, which were then very frequent. Her pleasures, which developed only gradually, had suddenly become very intense. For a long time I could not believe that, having been very ardent myself ever since my youth, but I believe it now. In most cases this situation is the husband's fault; he is in too much of a hurry to finish as soon as he enters, and does not know how to excite his wife's sensuality first, or else he gives up half way.
Roudolphine had compensations; she was charming and avid and only bore her husband's negligence with all the more bad humour. I shall not bother to tell you all the sports in which we engaged in her big English bed. Our revels were delightful, lascivious, and Roudolphine was insatiable in the pleasure she took in kisses and the contact of our two naked bodies. She enjoyed herself for two hours and hardly suspected that these hours were still too short for me, so much did I desire and so much did I pretend to yield only with difficulty and shame.
Our relationship soon became much more interesting, for Roudolphine consoled herself in secret for her husband's pranks. In the neighbouring town lived an Italian prince who usually stayed in Vienna where Roudolphine's husband looked after his financial affairs. The banker was the humble servant of the prince's huge fortune. The latter, about thirty years old, was outwardly a very severe and a very proud man with a scientific education and turn of mind; inwardly, however, he was dominated by the most intense sensuality. Nature had gifted him with exceptional physical strength. In addition, he was the most complete egotist I have ever met. He had but one aim in life, pleasure at all costs, and but one law, to preserve himself by dint of subterfuge from all the troublesome consequences of his affairs. When the banker was there, the prince often came to dine or to tea.
I had never noticed, however, that there was any affair between him and Roudolphine. I learned about it entirely by chance, for she was very careful never to breathe a word of it to me. The gardens of their two villas were adjacent, and one day when I was picking flowers behind a hedge I saw Roudolphine pluck a note from underneath a stone, conceal it quickly in her blouse and hurry away to her room. Suspecting some little intrigue, I peeped through her window and saw her hastily read and burn it. Then she sat own at her desk, I supposed, to compose the answer. So that she would suspect nothing, I hastened to my room and began to sing at the top of my voice, at the same time carefully watching the place in the garden where the note had been left. Soon Roudolphine appeared, walked along the hedge toying with the branches, then so swiftly and adroitly did she hide her reply that I did not catch it. However, I had noticed the spot where she had paused longest, and as soon as she had returned to the house, and I was certain that she was busy, I dashed into the garden. I easily found the message hidden under a stone. Back in my room with the door locked I read, 'Not today! Pauline is sleeping with me. I will tell her tomorrow that I am indisposed. For you, of course, I am not. Come tomorrow, then, as usual, at eleven o'clock.'
The note was in Italian and in disguised handwriting. You can well imagine that everything was at once clear to me. I had already made up my mind what to do. I did not return the note to where I had found it, for I wanted the prince to come that night and surprise us both in bed. I, the engènue, was in possession of Roudolphine's secret and I felt sure I would not come out of the situation empty handed. Of course, I still did not know how the prince would manage to get to Roudolphine's bedroom.
At lunch we had agreed to spend the night together, which is why she had refused the prince's visit. Over tea she explained to me that we could not sleep together for about a week, for she felt that her period was approaching. She thought this would delude me, but I had already woven my net around her. Above all, I had to get her to bed before eleven o'clock, so that she could find no means of avoiding, at the last minute, the surprise I had prepared for her.
We went to bed very early, and I was so frolicsome, so caressing, and so insatiable that she soon went to sleep out of sheer fatigue. Bosom against bosom, her thighs between mine, our hands reciprocally at the sources of our pleasure, we lay there, she fast asleep and I more and more wide awake and impatient. Suddenly I heard the floor of the alcove creak, the sound of muffled footsteps, and the door opened. I heard someone breathing, getting undressed and at last approaching the bed on Roudolphine's side.
'Now I was sure of myself, and I pretended to be very deeply asleep. The prince, for it was he, lifted up the bedclothes and lay down beside Roudolphine, who woke up terrified. I felt her trembling all over. Now came the catastrophe. He wanted to ascend immediately to the throne he had so many times possessed. She stopped him, asking hastily whether or not he had received her reply. Meanwhile, trying to get where he wanted, he had touched my hand and my arm. I cried out, I was beside myself, shuddering and pressing myself against Roudolphine. I was highly diverted by her fright and the prince's amazement. He had shouted an Italian oath, so that it was no use for Roudolphine to explain that it was her husband coming unexpectedly to surprise her. I overwhelmed her with reproaches and upbraided her with having exposed my youth and honour to such a dreadful scene, because I had recognised the prince's voice. The prince, a gallant and knowing man, soon realised, however, that he had nothing to lose. On the contrary, he was gaining an interesting partner. That was just what I expected him to think. After a few tender and amusing words he went to close the bedroom door, took out the keys, and returned to bed.
Roudolphine was between us. Now came the excuses, the explanations and the recriminations. But there was nothing to be done, nothing could be changed; we would have to keep quiet, all three of us, in order not to expose ourselves to the unpleasant consequences of so hazardous a meeting, a thing it would be hard to explain. Roudolphine calmed down little by little and the prince's words grew sweeter and sweeter. I, of course, was in floods of tears. By my reproaches I forced Roudolphine to make me her confidant and thus her accomplice in this illegal liaison. You can see that Marguerite's lessons and her adventures in Geneva were useful to me. In fact, it was exactly the same story accept that the prince and Roudolphine did not realise that they were merely puppets in my hands.
Roudolphine, then, no longer tried to hide from me the facts of her long-standing liaison with the prince, but she also revealed to him what she had been doing with me, the innocent young girl, and she told him how I burned with desire to learn more of these matters. That excited the prince and when I tried to make Roudolphine be quiet she only talked with all the more ardour of my sensuality! I noticed that he was pressing his thighs between those of Roudolphine and was trying in this way to reach the desired goal from the side. From time to time his legs brushed against mine, and I wept, I burned with curiosity. Roudolphine tried to console me, but with every movement the prince made she became more and more distraught. Soon she too squirmed about, trembled passionately, and finally moved her hand to my body to try to make me share her pleasure. Suddenly I noticed another hand straying where hers was already so busy. I could not allow that to continue, for I wanted to remain faithful to the role which I had given myself, so I turned over angrily towards the wall and, as Roudolphine had immediately taken away her own hand when she encountered that of her lover on this forbidden path, I was abandoned to my sulking and I myself had to finish secretly what my bed companion had begun.
Hardly had I turned my back on them when they forgot all restraint and all shame. The prince threw himself upon Roudolphine, who opened her legs as wide as possible to receive the beloved pest easily and quickly, and the bed shook at every movement. I was so consumed with desire and envy; I could not see anything, but my imagination was aflame. Then at the moment when the two lovers were fused most closely and overflowed, sighing and shuddering, I myself let loose so abundant a burning flood that I lost consciousness.
After the practical exercise came the theory. The prince was now between Roudolphine and myself, although I do not know whether this was by design or accident. He did not make the slightest movement, and I seemed to have nothing to fear, but I was perfectly aware that I had to keep quiet in order to maintain my superiority, and I waited to see what they would do next. Roudolphine explained to me first that, since her husband neglected her and ran after other women, she had every right to give herself freely to a cavalier so pleasant, so courtly, and above all, so discreet. She was in the best years of her life and did not want, indeed she was not able, to miss all the sweetest of earthly joys, especially since her doctors had advised her not to attempt to repress her natural sensuality. In any case, I knew that she was a very warm-natured woman, and she was sure that I was not indifferent to love, but only afraid of the consequences. She said that she simply wanted to remind me of what we had been doing together that evening before the unexpected arrival of the prince. I wanted to put my hand over her mouth to shut her up, but I could not do this without making a motion towards my neighbour, who seized my hand immediately and covered it with tender little kisses.
Now it was his turn to talk. His was not an easy role as he had to weigh every word so as not to hurt Roudolphine's feelings, but I realised by the intonation of his voice that be was more anxious to win me as quickly as possible than he was concerned about upsetting Roudolphine. However, by this time she was obliged to put up with anything in order to keep her secret.
I no longer remember what the prince said to soothe me, to excuse himself, and to prove that I had nothing to fear. I only remember that the warmth of his body was driving me crazy, that his hand was stroking first my breasts, then the rest of my body, and finally the very centre of his desires and mine. The state I was in defies description. The prince advanced slowly but surely; however, I could not allow him to kiss me, for he would then have noticed how I burned with desire to return his caresses. I was struggling with myself; I wanted to have done with this comedy, to put an end to my affected modesty, and to surrender entirely to the situation, but if I did that I would lose my advantage over the two sinners, and I would have been exposed to the dangers of love making with this violent and passionate man; for the prince would not have known how to limit his triumph once be was the victor.
I had noticed how feverishly be had finished with Roudolphine. All my entreaties would have been in vain, and perhaps even a backward movement would not have helped me. Besides, how could I tell whether, at the last moment, I would have been able to restrain myself? My whole artistic career was at stake, but I held my ground and let him do almost anything to me without responding to it, only defending myself desperately when the prince tried to obtain more. Roudolphine was at a loss as to what to say to me, or what she should do herself. She realised that my resistance had to be broken that night if she were going to be able to look me in the eyes the following day. To excite me even more, which was really quite unnecessary, she-lay her head upon my bosom, embraced me, licked my breasts, and finally hurled herself between my legs where she pressed her lips to the still-inviolate entry of the temple, and began a play so pleasant that I allowed her complete freedom. The prince had yielded his place to her, and he was now kissing me on the mouth.
Thus I was covered from head to foot with kisses. I was no longer making any attempt to resist, so he placed my hand upon his sceptre, and I permitted this familiarity unenthusiastically. My arm pressed between the thighs of Roudolphine, who was kneeling, and I noticed that the prince's other hand was now in the place where his sceptre had been revelling so short a time before. He taught me to caress it, to rub and squeeze it. The group we formed was complicated but extremely pleasant; it was dark and I was sorry not to be able to see, for one must enjoy these things with the eyes as well. Roudolphine was trembling, excited to the extreme by the kisses she was showering upon me and the caresses she was receiving from the prince. She was half senseless with delight and opened wide her legs, whereupon the prince suddenly straightened himself and took up a position which was thus far unknown to me, bending over and penetrating her from behind. I had pulled my hand away, but he seized it and brought it to the point where he was most intimately united with Roudolphine. He then taught me an occupation which I should never have dreamed of, and which enhanced the rapture of the two pleasure-seekers. I was now to squeeze the root of his dagger and now to caress the sheath which enclosed it. Although I pretended to be ashamed, I was in fact extremely zealous in doing this. Roudolphine kissed and licked passionately and, all three together, we soared quickly to the very summit of pleasure. It was so intoxicating that it took us a good quarter of an hour to recover ourselves. We felt much too hot, and on this summer night we could stand neither the contact of each other's bodies nor that of the bedclothes and we lay naked as far apart as we could.
After this passionate and sweltering action the discussion was resumed anew. The prince talked as calmly about this strange chance rendezvous as if he had organised a party in the country. Basing his assumptions on what Roudolphine had told him, he no longer took the trouble to win me, contenting himself simply with combating my fear of unhappy consequences. He was well aware that he would have no difficulty in convincing me. The virtuosity of my hand, the pleasure which I had tasted and which had been betrayed by my beating heart and the trembling of my thighs had revealed to him how sensual I was. He only had to prove to me that there was no danger and that is what he was trying to do with all the art of a man of the world.
For these reasons he imagined that it would only be a question of time. He therefore did not insist upon the repetition of such a night and soon left us, for dawn was in the offing. He was perfectly willing to sacrifice the length of time spent in pleasure in order to safeguard his secret and his safety. He had to go through the dressing room and a corridor, climb a ladder, go out through a window, crawl back in through a skylight before finding himself in his house again, from where he would have to creep stealthily back to his apartments. The leave-taking was a strange mixture of intimacy, tenderness, timidity, teasing and deference, and when he had left, neither Roudolphine nor I felt like talking things over any more. We were so tired that we fell asleep at once. Later, upon awakening, I intended to be inconsolable at having, fallen into the hands of a man, but I was really furious that she had told him about our pleasures. She did not even notice how much delight I found in her efforts to console me.
Naturally, I refused to sleep with her the next, telling her that my senses were never to lead me astray from my good resolutions another time, for I never wanted such a thing to happen again; I wanted to sleep by myself, and she was not to believe that I would ever permit the prince to do what she allowed him to do so easily. She was married and it would do no harm if she became pregnant, but I was an artist. A thousand eyes were upon me, and I did not dare do anything like that, which would bring me to disaster.
As I had expected, she then spoke to me about safety measures. She told me she had met the prince, at a time when she was not sleeping with her husband because of a quarrel, and that consequently, she did not dare to become pregnant. The prince had calmed all her fears by using condoms, and she told me that I could try them too. She also told me she was quite sure that the prince was very level-headed and had perfect control of his feelings. In any case, he knew another way of preserving a lady's honour and, if I were very nice to him, I would soon learn about it. In short, she tried by every means to persuade me to surrender to the prince, so that I might enjoy the gayest and happiest of hours. I gave her to understand that her explanations and her promises did not leave me entirely cold, but that I was still rather fearful.
Towards noon the prince came to visit Roudolphine, a polite visit which also included me. But I feigned illness and did not appear. This gave them the chance to agree freely upon the measures to take to overcome my resistance and to initiate me into their secret games. As I did not want to sleep with Roudolphine any more, they would probably arrange to surprise me in my bedroom as quickly as possible, so as not to leave me time to repent, and perhaps to go back to town. My surmise proved correct.
All that afternoon and evening, Roudolphine did not mention previous nights to me. She came up to my bedroom that night, however, and sent away the chambermaid. When I was in bed, she went to lock up the anteroom herself so that nobody would disturb us. Then she sat down on my bed and tried to convince me anew. She described everything to me in the most beautiful and seductive manner and assured me there was nothing to fear. Of course, I pretended that I did not know the prince was in her room and that he might even be listening from behind the door, so I had to be prudent and give in to her arguments little by little.
'But who is to guarantee to me that the prince will use the mask which you described?'
'I will. Do you think that I would let me do anything more with you than what I let him do with me at first? I promise you that he will not appear without a mask at this ball.'
'But it must hurt terribly. You know he guided my hand and made me feel his strength.'
'At the very beginning it may really hurt you, but there are remedies for that, too. You have some oil of almonds and some cold cream. We will smear his lance with them so that he can penetrate more easily.'
'Are you quite sure that no drop of that dangerous liquid can get through to bring about my misfortune?'
'Come now, do you think that I would have given in without that assurance? Everything was at stake then, as I had no contacts at all with my husband at that time. When I had made up with him I permitted the prince everything. But now I arrange things so that he visits me at least once every time the prince has been here. And so I have nothing to fear any longer.'
'The thought of that misfortune horrifies me. Besides, there is still the shame of giving oneself to a man. I do not know what to do. Everything you say charms me, and my senses are urging me to take your advice, but for nothing in the world would I put up with another night like the last, for I know that I should never be able to resist again. You are quite right. The prince is as gallant as he is handsome, and you will never know what feelings were aroused in me when I heard the sounds of your surrender there beside me.'
'I too had a double pleasure in letting you share, although very imperfectly, in what I was feeling myself. I should never have thought that pleasure among three could be as violent as that which I tasted myself last night. I had read about it in books, but I always thought that it was exaggerated. The thought of a woman sharing herself between two men is odious to me, but I think that the accord between two women and a sensible, discreet man is delightful; but of course the two women must be true friends. One of them must not be more timid and more fearful than the other, and that is still your trouble, Pauline, dear.'
'It is just as well that your prince is not here, my dear, to hear your conversation. I really shouldn't know how to resist him, for I am totally consumed by what you have been telling me. Just look how I am burning, here, and how I am trembling all over.'
As I spoke, I uncovered myself - part of my thighs - and placed myself in such a position that if anyone were looking through the keyhole he would not miss a thing. If the prince were really there this was the moment for him to come in - and he did.
As you might have expected of an experienced and perfect man of the world, he understood at once that no talking was necessary, that he should conquer first and talk about it later. By the way Roudolphine had behaved I could see that everything had been arranged in advance. I tried to hide under the bedclothes, but she pulled them off me; I started to weep and she laughingly smothered me with kisses. Although at last I expected the ultimate fulfilment of the desire which had been mine for so long, I still had to be patient for I had reckoned without Roudolphine's jealousy. In spite of the necessity of making me her accomplice, in spite of the fear of seeing her plans come to naught at the last minute, she was not going to sacrifice to me the first fruits of this day's pleasure. With an expression on her face that I envied, but which I dared not unmask if I were to stay within my own role, she told the prince that I had consented and that I was ready to do anything, but that I wanted to be certain of the efficiency of the means used, and that she would like to submit to a demonstration in front of me.
It was obvious that the prince was not expecting such an offer, and that he would have preferred to have carried out this trial directly with me rather than with Roudolphine. She took several of the small bladders from her pocket, breathed into one to show that it was impermeable, then moistened it and put it on with many caresses and giggles. After that she quickly undressed and lay down on the bed beside me, pulling the prince down on top of her, and exhorting me to watch closely so that I would lose all fear.
And so I really did see everything. I saw the delight of this handsome couple. I saw his strength and his power; I saw him penetrate her, and I saw her rise to meet him, and saw them forget everything around them as the ecstasy grew until finally the flow took place amid sighs and shudders of delight.
Roudolphine did not relax the hold of her thighs before she had recovered her senses. Then with a beaming face she removed the condom and showed me triumphantly that not a single drop had overflowed. She took all the trouble imaginable to make me understand that which Marguerite had already explained to me so well, but which I had never been able to procure for myself. For in that case Franz could have used it, too.
Roudolphine overflowed with joy. She had demonstrated to me her supremacy and had gathered the first fruits of the prince, who had certainly been expecting another dish that evening. I decided that later I would take my revenge. The prince, however, was very kind. Instead of making the most of his advantage, be treated us both very tenderly. He took nothing, contenting himself with what we were ready to give him, and spoke with passion of the pleasure which divine chance had brought him in the persons of so charming a pair of women. Describing our relationship in the most glowing colours, he filled in the time that be needed to gather up his strength once more. He was no longer very young, but be was still valiant as a lover, and at last the moment arrived. He entreated me to trust myself to him absolutely. Roudolphine very prettily made the victor's toilet, while I watched, peeping through my fingers. The cold cream was lavishly applied, and at last the longed-for instant arrived: I was about to receive a man. For a long time I had been wondering how I was going to deceive the prince about my virginity, because the first time I had used Marguerite's instrument I had lost that which men prize so highly.
As I wanted to surrender myself and since I had consented to be the third person in their games, I felt that I should behave myself without false modesty, and I let my two companions do all that they desired to me. Roudolphine laid me down on the bed in such a position that my head was leaning against the wall and my two thighs were hanging over the side of the bed, parted as much as possible. With eyes of fire, the prince gazed upon the delights spread before his view. Searing my mouth with burning kisses, he moved my hand away and placed his lance in, sliding it up and down very gently in the font. Roudolphine followed his slightest movement with eyes full of desire. Then he thrust his lance in as gently as possible. Up till then a very sweet sensation had penetrated me, but I had not felt any real delight. As he pressed, however, I was really being hurt and I began to moan.
Roudolphine encouraged me by sucking the tips of my breasts and fondling the place where the prince was trying to get in; she counselled me to arch my thighs upwards as much as possible. I obeyed automatically and the prince suddenly entered with such force that he penetrated halfway. I uttered a cry of pain and began to weep in earnest. I was lying there like a lamb at the sacrifice; however, I had made up my mind to go through with it. The prince moved slowly, this way and that, trying to penetrate further. I felt that all was not well; a muscle, a little skin, something anyway, had stopped him. Roudolphine had stuffed a handkerchief into my mouth to stifle my cries and I was now biting it in pain. I bore everything, however, to attain at last what I had desired so ardently.
Something wet was trickling down my thighs. Roudolphine cried out triumphantly. 'Blood! It's blood! Congratulations, prince, on obtaining this beautiful virginity.' The prince, who so far had proceeded as gently as possible, quite forgot himself and penetrated so vigorously that I felt his hair entangled in mine. That did not hurt me too much, though, for the most painful part of the proceedings was over, but my expectations were not satisfied in the slightest. My conqueror became more passionate. Suddenly, I felt something hot flowing inside me, then the vigour relaxed and the member escaped. Really, I should be telling lies if I talked about pleasure. According to what Marguerite had told me, and according to my own experiments, I had been expecting something much greater than that. And I well remembered the enthusiasm my parents had shown too. At any rate, I was glad to see that my trick had succeeded and that I had not been wrong in my calculations.
As I lay there pretending to be unconscious I heard the prince talking enthusiastically about the visible signs of my virginity. My blood had, in fact, bespattered the bed and his dressing gown. This was far more than I had dared to hope for, especially after my wretched attempt with Marguerite's instrument; there was such a tremendous difference between that thing and the prince's mature virility! In any case, it was through no merit of mine that I had still been a virgin, but only through chance.
Virginity is actually a mythical thing anyway. I have often talked to other women about it and have heard the most contradictory statements. Some girls have so wide a membrane that there can be no obstacle to the first entry, while others have one so narrow that even after having several times participated in love bouts a man entering will still think that be is the first. In addition, it is very easy to deceive a man, especially if he believes that the girl is well behaved. This can be done by waiting until her period is about due before she surrenders, when she must moan a bit and twist around as if in pain, and the happy possessor swears that he has been the first, for a few drops of blood from a different source will easily mislead him.
But it was high time for me to awaken from my fainting fit. I had had my own way, and now I wanted to take pleasure without leaving my role of the seduced girl. The most important part had been acted. The prince and Roudolphine found particular delight in consoling me, for they were sure that they had initiated a novice. They both undressed and got into bed with me, the prince in the middle. The bed curtains were drawn and a delightful and indescribable game began. The prince was nice enough not to talk about love, languor or nostalgia. He was merely sensual, but with delicacy, for he knew that this quality is a spice to love play. I was still pretending that I had been violated, but that I was learning all the more quickly.
His two hands were busy with us, and ours with him. The more complicated our kisses became, the more animated our hands were and the more restless our bodies. Our nerves trembled with pleasure. It is a very great delight to kiss such a man, and he would have had to be made of stone not to warm up again. Even so, the second ejaculation had tired him. Sometimes he played with Roudolphine, sometimes with me, but I never let him approach without first having made his toilet, although he was very sure of himself. He gave me his word that I could try without a mask, that I risked nothing, that he was completely in control of himself. But I was not to be so easily tempted from the path I had chosen. So he began with Roudolphine, who lost consciousness two or three times without his strength being diminished. Then he washed and came to me. It still hurt a bit at first, but soon pleasure began to prevail, and for the first time I experienced complete fulfilment.
To prove to me once and for all that he was entirely master of his body, he did not finish inside me, but pulled out without ejaculating while I was half fainting with delight. He tore the condom wildly away and threw himself upon Roudolphine. She told me to come and sit upon her face and that she would calm with her tongue what the prince had brought to fever pitch. I was very reluctant, but a damp cloth refreshed the object of my desires and a charming group was soon composed. While the prince mounted Roudolphine, I knelt with my thighs wide apart over her face. Her tongue had plenty of room for its revels, for her head was thrown back over the pillows. Completely naked, because the prince had pulled off my nightdress in his passionate impatience, I was face to face with this magnificent man who now crushed my breasts against his chest and kissed me unceasingly.
Two tongues revived the fire which had hardly been extinguished. My pleasure increased and my kisses grew more and more passionate as I abandoned myself completely to this double excitement. The prince was enthralled, assuring us that he had never before experienced such happiness. At the moment of the spasm I grew jealous, thinking of that warm wave of rapture spreading through Roudolphine and so, pretending to faint, I let myself fall heavily to one side. As I had ejaculated, I threw Roudolphine's cavalier right out of the saddle, and as I fell I saw their organs disunited where they had been so closely linked before. How fiery red and excited his was, how wide and violently open hers was. It was quite different from anything I had previously seen, though not more pleasant. I frightened them by falling, and they had no thought of pursuing their pleasures further, but came to help me.
I had reached my goal and was not long in coming to my senses. I made no secret of being very happy that I had been initiated with such art into the mysteries of love, but I refused to begin again as I could not stand any more. The prince wished to show us that he could give up the greatest of pleasures if we could not all share it together. He said that he left it to us to content him. I did not know what he was expecting, but Roudolphine, more lascivious than ever, accepted at once. The prince lay back naked on the bed and I had to imitate Roudolphine, who provoked with her fingers the marvellous fountain. As I kissed him and played with the oval containers of his sweet balm, Roudolphine took the shaft in her mouth. Finally, the foamy jet sprang forth and fell upon us all. I would have liked to have taken the place of Roudolphine, who absorbed most of this burning fluid, but I still had to pretend to be inexperienced and just learning everything. You can understand why I cannot forget that incomparable night. The prince left us well before daybreak, and both Roudolphine and I, closely entwined, slept until after midday.
The Amatory Experiences of a Surgeon
It is one of the requirements of society that the feminine portion of it should wear, at least to outward gaze, the semblance of virtue; yet there is nothing in female human nature which is more difficult to adhere to.
Among the males, society tolerates vice of all kinds, which does not actually bring the perpetrator within the pale of the law; but with woman, one false step - nay, the very breath of slander - is sufficient to cast her, a degraded being without the pale of its magic circle.
Can we picture a more pitiable position than that of a young woman, in the prime of her youth and beauty, condemned to await in silence the adventure of the opposite sex, with the knowledge that the person whom she is prevailed upon at last to accept may, after all, turn out to be an impostor, totally disqualified for performing those functions that are necessary to the happiness of married life.
We medical men are not ignorant of the secret pangs and unruly desires that consume the bashful virgin, and that piety with its ordinances prevents her from finding a safe vent for. We have often the means of tracing all the passionate thoughts, and sometimes the secret wanton doings, of those whom kind society has condemned to disease, rather than to allow nature to take its own proper course and allay those symptoms so detrimental to young girls.
Who shall say how many victims have been sacrificed on the altar of mock modesty for fear that the disgrace of the only natural cure for their complaint should blast their characters?
I have alluded to the circumstances which have come to my knowledge from time to time, with reference to the expedients made use of to allay those raging fires which in too many cases prematurely exhaust the constitutions of our young women; and one of these cases will suffice to prove how ingenious are the designs to cheat society of its whimsical requirements.
A young lady, not yet eighteen years of age, was under my care for a complaint of the bladder, in which the symptoms denoted the presence of calculus, or stone. An operation became necessary, which the patient underwent with unexampled fortitude.
I could not conceal a suspicion from the first that the young girl could, if she choose, enlighten us to the nature of the case; but strange to say, she absolutely preferred to submit to a painful and dangerous operation, with the knowledge that death might possibly ensue, rather than render us any information which might lead to a correct conclusion.
The operation was performed successfully. A mass of calculus was removed, and as these formations never take place without something to build up a 'nucleus,' we began to search.
We recommended the usual examination, only to discover that the formation had for its nucleus a hairpin, which must have been introduced by the fair hands of the young patient herself, doubtless not without a sufficient covering to render the insertion tolerably agreeable.
The result was that the inexperienced girl had allowed the hairpin to become disengaged, and instead of getting into the entrance she had intended, it had slipped into the urethra, and thence into the bladder, from whence the very nature of its shape had prevented its returning.
This instance is only one of a number I could give my readers, illustrative of the shifts young ladies are frequently driven to in order to satisfy, in secret and by illicit means those desires which they are prevented from openly exhibiting and which they dare not appease by nature's only fit and proper remedy, connection with the other sex.
I have promised in these pages a faithful recital of events that, having befallen me, have left a sufficiently warm interest in their remembrance to entitle them to a place here; and true to this promise I am about to relate my adventure in the case of the sisters before alluded to.
As I have already stated, they were daughters of an opulent resident in the town. They both inherited the pretty face and elegant form of their mother, who, when they were quite children, had committed them in her last hours to their father's paternal regard.
I was the medical attendant of the family, and as such it fell to me to be depository of such little complaints as there two young beauties had to make.
At the time I write, the elder was just sixteen.
I had of late observed in her those usual indications of approaching puberty that disturb the imagination of young girls, and I knew from her symptoms that nature was working powerfully within her to establish her claim to be treated as a woman.
One day on calling, I found that Mr H— had gone out hunting, and would not return until late in the evening. It was then four o'clock in the afternoon of a hot and close summer day. The two young creatures were alone, and received me with the modest grace so captivating to a young man.
I stood and chatted until the time for paying my other visits had passed, and as none of them were pressing and could as well be paid the following day, I remained to tea.
After tea the younger of the two girls complained of headache, and after a little while she went upstairs to lie down, leaving her sister to sustain the conversation.
I played the agreeable with all my powers of attraction. I gazed on her with longing eyes. My looks followed every movement of her body, and my wandering fancy drew an exquisite picture of all her concealed beauties.
Gradually love grew into ardent desire - a desire so strong that I had some difficulty to keep my seat, while my rampant member stood beneath my trousers with the strength of a bar of iron.
Each moment only served to increase my fever, while I fancied I observed an embarrassment on her part, which seemed to hint that she was not ignorant of the storm that raged within me. Innocent as she was, and all inexperienced in the ways of the world, nature stirred within her powerfully and doubtless whispered that there was some hidden fascination in my gaze, something wanting to content her.
At length, tea things were sent away, and I could find no reasonable excuse to linger longer by the beautiful being who had so fiercely tempted me.
I rose to go. She rose also. As she did so, a certain uneasiness in her manner assured me that she had something to communicate. I asked her if she felt unwell, pretending that I observed an unusual paleness on her lovely face.
She said she had something to tell me, and proceeded to detail the usual symptoms of a first perception of the menses, which had occurred a few days previously and which had at first much alarmed her.
I assured her on this subject, explained the cause, and promised relief. And on taking my departure I requested her to come to my house on the following day, and said I would then investigate her case.
With what impatience I passed the interval may be easily imagined by any of my readers who have been similarly situated. But as the longest night must have at length an end, so did this, and morning broke to dispel the restless dreams of unruly passion that had held me enthralled.
I anxiously awaited the time of my young patient's arrival, and my heart danced with joy as I heard her timid knock at my street door.