Endeavors
Cecilia Kavanagh
Endeavors
Copyright © 2009 by Cecilia Kavanagh
All rights reserved.
Illustration: Copyright © 2009 by Cecilia Kavanagh
All rights reserved
Cover design by Cecilia Kavanagh
Author’s Notes: I wanted to thank you personally for purchasing or downloading this e-book. It means so much to me that someone would want to read my words, whether or not you bought it, downloaded it for free, or had it given to you by a friend as a recommendation. That last one especially makes me grateful. This short story is for anyone who has encouraged my writing, whether it was verbally or by doing something that made me want to write. I love you all!
Endeavors
“Cecilia?”
His smooth voice cut through the night on the camp ground. She
muttered something, shifting in her bed. She hugged the pillow to her
chest, falling back into her sleep. “Ceci...” He
whispered, taking a chance and throwing a small pebble at her window.
She awoke.
“What the...?” She breathed, not
opening her eyes or moving from her blankets. “Jacob? What are
you doing?” Cecilia asked, sitting up, wrapping the sheets
around her body. She twisted so she faced the window and peered out
into the night, searching for his face.
“Just come
outside.” He whispered, pleading now. She groaned softly,
glancing around her cabin, worried. “No one else is out here.
Just come.” Cecilia yawned once, before swinging her legs over
the edge of the bed, padding across the floor to the screen door. She
opened it carefully, holding it until she could press it back into
the frame, reassuring herself it couldn't slam and alert the others
to her absence.
“What do you want?” She hissed,
freezing now. He hadn't told her it was this cold; she thought. How
she longed for her blankets back in the cabin. Suddenly; there was
warmth. She looked at her arms, finding them sheathed in a black
leather jacket. “Oh.” It wasn't so much the word, but an
expression of shock and pleasure. “Thank you.” Her tone
had gone from immensely frustrated to grateful and soft.
Jacob
shrugged, slinging an arm over her shoulder. “I wanted to show
you something.” He told her, and she blinked, pulling the
jacket around her closely. Cecilia tilted her head up to gaze at him;
he was a good 7 inches taller than her.
“What is so
important that you felt the urge to disturb a very wonderful dream;
not to mention my beauty sleep?” She teased, her eyes sparkling
and white teeth flashing in the moonlight as she laughed softly;
barely breathing to keep anyone from hearing them. Jacob shrugged,
his whole body feeling as though he had just been buried in a snow
bank; that tingly numbing feeling that wouldn't go away no matter how
many hot chocolates you downed.
“You don't need the
beauty sleep first of all, and second,” He looked down at her
for the first time that night, “what was the dream about?”
He whispered. She flushed instantly, grateful for the night hiding
the pink that graced her cheekbones. She shook her head, tucking her
hands in the pockets of his jacket.
“It doesn't matter.”
She muttered, scuffing her foot against the ground. “What did
you want to show me?” She asked softly, smiling softly now.
Jacob thought for a moment, watching her. Her eyes darted up to his
face. “Why are you looking at me like that?” Her hands
flew to her wavy hair, pulling it over one shoulder. Jacob chuckled
lowly, shaking his head.
“I don't know how to answer
that exactly.” He said hesitantly. He stopped. Jacob Matthews
was never hesitant, he was impulsive and confident. He didn't get
nervous around girls, especially not his new best friend, Cecilia
Addison. Except; he did. They had met at summer camp, bonding
instantly over a love of 90's music. He sighed softly. She placed a
hand on his shoulder, doing her part as the concerned sincere
friend.
“What's wrong Matt?” She whispered, her
grasp halting him and turning his body to face her. He groaned
inwardly; he knew she wasn't that strong. Clearly, he was doing this
of his own accord. Jacob shook his head, staring down at the ground.
“Matt.” Her nickname for him, not really a nickname
though, since it was merely an abbreviation on his last name, brought
him out of his thoughts.
“Yes Addi?” He looked
down at her slowly. That new nickname was awkward, he decided. It
would be best to stick to her real name. She was watching him
intently, her bright green eyes searching his for evidence of what
could be wrong with her friend. He sighed again. “Ceci, I don't
even know what's wrong with me. I don't think you're going to be able
to figure it out either.” Jacob dropped onto the dock they were
both so familiar with from prior meetings over the summer.
She
huffed in indignation, sitting down next to him. He laughed softly,
kicking off his shoes and socks, letting his legs dangle into the
lake. She did the same, peeling off her socks and tossing them in the
direction of his shoes. Her legs fell a few inches short of the
water's surface. She settled for swinging her legs idly. “What's
wrong Jacob?” She whispered, her eyes swimming with unshed
tears. He could hear the emotion tracing her words.
“Ceci,
are you crying?” He asked, pulling his legs out of the frigid
water to face her. She shook her head, blinking back the tears.
“Ceci...” He sighed, hugging her. “Nothing is
wrong. I promise.” Jacob told her, staring out at the
moon.
Cecilia shrugged, following his gaze. It was easier to
talk this way, not having to look him in the eye. “It's just
that sometimes you stare at me, and you get this strange look in your
eye. One I don't recognize from anywhere else. And it scares me,
because I think I'm hurting you when you look at me like that.”
She mumbled, looking down at the water. Jacob blinked.
“You're
not hurting me. I'm hurting myself, because I don't know why I look
at you like that. I don't know why I can talk to you like this,”
he gestured helplessly between them, “and not any of my other
friends. I don't know why I think about you all the time, and I
certainly don't know why I find myself throwing rocks at your window
at one in the morning, when I should be asleep.”
She
stared at him wordlessly. “And the sick thing is, even when I'm
asleep, you're there.” He ran his hands through his hair, his
voice shaking in frustration. You're everywhere Cecilia, and I don't
know why.” Jacob's voice had been rising rapidly, his eyes not
meeting hers. She stared down at the water, still swinging her
legs.
“I don't know what to say.” She finally
admitted, scared by the intensity of his statements. Jacob didn't
look at her. “Matt...” Cecilia reached out for his hand,
touching it lightly. It was though she had touched him with a
lighter. He shifted away from her sharply. “Jacob.” She
whispered brokenly, the tears finally spilling over. “I never
wanted to hurt you.”
He laughed, still not meeting her
eyes. “You're not hurting me, you're just...you're everywhere.
I can't figure out how I feel about you, not when you're always
around me.” She opened her mouth to speak. “No. I don't
mean you're literally always there; but what I was talking about
before. I can't get away from the idea of you...and strangely; I'm
not sure that I want to get away from you.”
Cecilia's
mouth opened and closed slowly, nothing coming forth. “What...huh?”
She stammered, not even totally sure she was awake. “Do you
want me to leave? So you can think or something?” She offered
weakly, standing up to leave.
“Even if you left now,
you'd always be with me. You're always on my mind; always in my
heart.” Jacob mumbled, his eyes on the water, watching the
ripples from the rock he had thrown in frustration. Cecilia sat down
again, watching him silently.
“Jacob?” He turned,
his eyes finally hitting hers for the first time in a while. “Am
I even awake right now? Somehow, everything feels lighter. Everything
is different, and I think I might be asleep.” She whispered
dizzily. Jacob blinked, pushing himself to his feet effortlessly. He
stood in front of her, his hands on her shoulders.
“Ceci,
don't mess with me right now. Everything is light, like you're
floating; only you're not. Different, but it's such a good different.
Like a dull, burning ache that you can't get rid of, no matter how
you try? It's the worst pain in the world, but at the same time, you
never want it to stop?” She nodded wordlessly, not completely
sure she knew where he was going with this rant. “Cecilia
Addison, welcome to my world.” He sighed, dropping his hands
and sitting down again. She stared at him.
“What are you
talking about Jacob?” She demanded softly, sitting next to him.
“How did you know exactly how I was feeling?” She asked,
not sure she really wanted to hear what he had to say. Somehow, she
already knew.
“Ceci, have you ever felt like this
before?” He asked his tone suddenly very intent. She paused,
nodding slowly. “Around anyone in particular?” Jacob
pressed, looking up at the moon. Cecilia followed his gaze. She
nodded again, reluctantly this time. “Want to name him?”
He asked, studying the stars.
Cecilia sighed, crossing her
arms. “I don't see how this is explaining how you knew exactly
how I was feeling.” She whispered, very defensive. Jacob rolled
his eyes, lying down on the dock. “Jacob, what's going on?”
She pressed, lying down next to him.
“Just answer the
question. Anyone in particular?” He closed his eyes, linking
his hands behind his head. She groaned inwardly, knowing he wouldn't
rest until he got his answer.
“You.” She mumbled.
Jacob sat up, that look in his eyes back. “But I still don't
know
how―” He put a hand over her mouth, cutting her off. He
stared into her eyes as she struggled against his hand.
“I
knew how you felt because that's how I feel every moment I'm around
you. Every moment that I think of you, I feel that.” He
admitted, running
a hand through his hair again, causing it to look severely
disheveled.
“Oh.” Cecilia mouthed, rolling over so
she was on her stomach, hands dangling over the water. She ran her
index finger over the surface, her whole body tingling from the low
temperatures. “Well, now what?” She asked, resting her
chin in the palm of her other hand. Jacob shrugged, mirroring her
actions.
“All I know is that I need to make this pain go
away.” He whispered, staring into the water. She nodded,
drawing hearts now. “I understand if you want to go back to
bed. I know it's a lot to take in one night.” He smiled softly,
standing up and helping her to her feet.
Cecilia nodded,
letting go of his hand. “I need to sleep.” She mumbled,
the two beginning the long walk back to her cabin. Minutes later, she
stopped, turning to him hesitantly. “I'll see you in the
morning?” She whispered, throwing a glance to where her friends
slept.
Jacob nodded slowly, brushing her cheek with his lips
softly. “Sleep well.” He told her, drawing her close for
one last hug. He released her and she trudged up the steps of her
cabin slowly, opening the door and sliding in quietly. Moments later,
she was sound asleep, still wrapped in his leather jacket.
“Good
morning.” Jacob greeted as Cecilia fell into her usual seat at
their table. “You look tired.” He commented, lifting a
forkful of scrambled eggs to his mouth. She nodded, her head dropping
onto the table, her coppery red hair spilling out around her.
“Coffee?” She muttered while grimacing as Jacob
pushed his cup across the table to her, grinning broadly.
“You...coffee...black.” Cecilia didn't move her head from
where it rested, instead turning it down with her hands. Jacob
shrugged and left it there.
“I made it how you like it.
Somehow I knew you'd be tired.” Jacob told her, and she picked
up her head hesitantly, watching him suspiciously. “Yes, two
sweeteners, a shot of 2 percent milk and a teaspoon of nutmeg.”
He confirmed pushing it closer. She took a sip, smiling in pure
pleasure.
“You are the best.” She told him, her
voice slightly brighter than it was before. He chuckled, before
throwing the cup of coffee a dirty glance.
“I don't know
how you drink that sweet stuff. It's disgusting.” He told her,
standing up. “But whatever. Grab it and let's get moving. I
never got to show you what I meant to last night.” Cecilia
groaned, lifting herself from the table, clutching his coffee
cup.
“Matt, please don't make me walk.” She
whined, trudging after him. He turned back, a smirk playing on his
lips. “Don't look at me like that.” Cecilia groaned,
dragging her feet.
“I can carry you.” Jacob
offered, and took a step closer. Cecilia nodded slowly, her balance
wavering. He chuckled and scooped her into his arms. “You need
to eat more. You're practically weightless. Drink the coffee.”
He told her, walking at a brisk pace.
She muttered something,
her head falling against his shoulder. “I'm going back to
sleep.” She mumbled, taking another long drag of coffee. Jacob
shook his head, setting her down in a canoe. “Why am I in a
canoe?” Cecilia demanded, blinking. Jacob stepped in, sitting
across from her.
“Because I'm showing you something.”
He stated, rolling his eyes as though it were obvious. Cecilia rolled
her eyes mockingly, laughing quietly. Jacob continued to row, looking
around as though he were searching for something.
“What
are you looking for?” She asked, taking another sip of coffee.
Jacob shook his head, flipping his long brown hair out of his eyes.
“Matt, maybe I can help you find whatever it is you're looking
for.”
He smiled softly. “You already helped me.”
He told her. Cecilia blinked; very confused. She hadn't done
anything, had she?
“What did I do?” She asked,
peering at him, very curious. Jacob chuckled, dropping the oars in
the bottom of the boat. “Jacob? What did I do?” She
repeated, scooting closer to him as he continued to look for
something.
He finally glanced at her, his eyes sparkling as he
drew her closer. “You helped me find what I was missing.”
Cecilia blinked, tilting her head to the side so all of her vivid
hair fell over one shoulder.
“But I didn't...wait. What
are you showing me?” She asked, suddenly very suspicious. Jacob
shrugged nonchalantly, and she rolled her eyes. “Way to be
helpful Jacob.” She teased, quietly humming the chorus to 'Kiss
Me' by Sixpence None the Richer. It was the push he needed. He
pointed over her shoulder, at a large gray mountain.
“You
see that mountain?” He inquired, and she stopped humming,
nodding slowly. How could she miss it? It was huge. “You
never told me you had your first kiss in front of it.” He
stated, almost accusingly. Cecilia blinked again, trying not to laugh
at how ridiculous he was being.
“Jacob, I've told you I
haven't had my first kiss ye―” Her eyes widened in
realization as Jacob
kissed her softly. It was simple, but she knew it would be the best
kiss of her life. She dropped the still half full coffee mug to the
bottom of the canoe, letting it spill.