PRANKS
Screenplay by
Bayhas H. Alirtemat
© PA 2-479-581 Copyright 2010 by Bayhas H. Alirtemat
Smashwords Edition
prankz321@gmail.com
FADE IN FROM BLACK
INT. APARTMENT BUILDING - HALLWAY - DAY
A Spanish grandmother schlepps a five year old unruly little rascal, across a hallway of a moldy apartment building.
The child drags his hand against the hallway's rotted wallpaper on the dilapidated wall.
The child gets baffled when he approaches an apartment door. He procrastinates.
The grandmother struggles pulling the slow, chubby child.
GRANDMOTHER
(In Spanish)
C'mon little one, C'mon.
Like a broken wheel of a shopping cart, the heavy kid skids.
The grandmother notices the door. Frightened, she draws the sign of the cross.
GRANDMOTHER (CONT'D)
(In Spanish)
Holy mother of God.
The grandmother pulls the child away.
GRANDMOTHER (CONT'D)
(In Spanish)
C'mon little one, C'mon.
The child looks back.
On the door of apartment 70B, a Coptic golden crucifix Ankh hangs upside down, swings slowly.
INT. STUDIO APARTMENT 70B - CONTINUOUS
On the back of apartment 70B's door, hangs a priest's cassock and violet stole embroidered with golden crosses.
Someone (O.S) whistles along with the song "By the river of Babylon" on the radio.
A bookcase stacked with mostly religious books lines the wall of a well-kept apartment.
Above an old electric wooden fireplace mantel, family pictures are handsomely displayed.
Pictures from the 1990's, shows a large linebacker young man, receiving his high school diploma.
Framed newspaper clippings of him as a decorated Marine sergeant are hung on the wall behind the mantel.
A picture signed by President George W. Bush, pinning a medal on the brave Marine's chest, is displayed next to a Purple Heart Medal, on the other side of the mantel.
On top, in a space between the shelves, hangs a "Knights of Templar" red suede shield. In the middle of the shield, an outline of a missing cross is noticeable.
Bare feet lying on a bed across from the wall, are reflected on the screen of a broken old wooden TV set.
INT. STUDIO APARTMENT 70B - BATHROOM - CONTINUOUS
The 40-year-old with a crew-cut, muscular man in the pictures whistles along with the record while he washes his hands in the bathroom sink.
The armed security guard walks up to the mirrored bureau, leers as he straightens his nametag, MARTIN.
MARTIN walks up to the door, opens it, looks back.
MARTIN
See ‘a.
Martin salutes back with two fingers.
MARTIN (CONT'D)
Don't wanna be ‘a.
Martin continues to whistle, turns the lights off, departs and slams the door shut.
The stole hangs on the back of the apartment door falls. It exposes the largest golden embroidered cross.
INSERT - The bloodstained water in the bathroom sink WHIRLS, GURGLES as it empties.
INT. STUDIO APARTMENT 70B - MOMENTS LATER
The bathroom dim light illuminates the hilt of the missing ancient cross.
The hilt of the pewter cross protrudes from the heart of the bloody half naked man who's lying in bed.
The brutally mutilated body of the dead man is identical to Martin who just left.
SUPER: Friday, June 9, 2004.
EXT. COUNTRY ROAD (CALABASAS HIGH SCHOOL ROAD) - AFTERNOON
From the sky, a sport red convertible speeds through a dense forested snaky road, toward a lone school campus.
EXT. CALABASAS HIGH - FRONT - CONTINUOUS
The traffic light in front of Calabasas high school is red for the red Ferrari's fast speed.
The Tux wearing 25 year old Driver dangerously swerves the car right, into the school's empty parking lot first opened gate, rubber burning and all.
The Driver careens through the parking lot. To his right, he passes a three levels horseshoe shaped high school campus.
The Driver makes a quick left turn into the school's little street leads toward the school's concrete sign's entrance, near the green traffic-light.
The Driver takes a quick right turn at the green light. Continues with the same speed and direction.
The Driver shrugs his shoulders like nothing happened.
His date with the red night gown, just stares at him.
EXT. CALABASAS HIGH CAMPUS - FRONT - CONTINUOUS
The upper half of the school's concrete sign at the entrance permanently displays: Calabasas high school, home of the wolves.
The LED bottom half of the sign flashes:
"Tomorrow...Saturday...June 10, 2004 [Flashes three times]...is graduation day...congrats grads"
The three levels horseshoe shaped school campus behind the front parking lot consists of three principal buildings. Each is two stories high.
INT. CALABASAS HIGH - LOWER LEVEL CLASSROOM - AFTERNOON
Mr. ALLEN 39, a hip teacher, faces a classroom full of rowdy teenage students.
MR. ALLEN
Guys, guys. GUYS. Take it easy -- you haven't graduated yet. Take it easy.
The students laugh.
MR. ALLEN (CONT'D)
You're laughing -- I'm serious.
CARTER (SKIP) 18, an interracial teen, a natural leader with olive complexion. His cool hat covers his short curly hair. Speaks with a big smile that stays with you forever.
CARTER (SKIP)
The hell we didn't, Mr. Allen.
MR. ALLEN
Tomorrow, Carter. Tomorrow.
CARTER
Tomorrow, today -- what's the difference?
ALL
Yeah, Mr. Allen. What's the difference?
MR. ALLEN
What's the difference? Boy, what a difference a day make in people's lives. Tomorrow, my dears, is going to be the very first day of your professional lives. A huge difference, wouldn't you agree?
CARTER
I object, your Honor.
NINA 19, a tomboy Spanish teen with short multi colored mainly black hair. She's pierced all over, wears a bikers faded leather jacket, fingerless black leather gloves and long black boots.
NINA
Over ruled.
All laugh.
MR. ALLEN
Look at you. You've made it -- all of you. I'm very proud of you.
EMILY DANIEL 17, a smart, full figured, sexy and beautiful teen. With her sandy blond hair and the way she dresses, you'd think she's a lawyer.
EMILY
Barely.
Emily gently pushes George.
GEORGE (RED) 17, a chubby and curly Jewish afro redhead teen with a sweet full of eczema face. He wears neon, candy colored childish clothes. Gently, he pushes Emily's hand away.
GEORGE (RED)
Stop it.
MR. ALLEN
Welcome to the world of growing up.
GEORGE
I don't wanna grow up, Mr. Allen.
The kids laugh.
MR. ALLEN
Uh oh.
GEORGE
I'm serious.
DEBBIE 18, a stocky body and fuzzy haired young lady. Her thick eyeglasses can be seen behind the video camera lens as she films George.
DEBBIE
(Passionately)
Why, George?
GEORGE
Who wants to deal with all of that adult crap?
All giggle.
ALL
Loser.
GEORGE
Shut up.
MR. ALLEN
Give him a chance guys. Give him a chance.
The students become silent.
MR. ALLEN (CONT'D)
Go ahead, George -- explain. Why don't you wanna grow up?
GEORGE
Because.
EMILY
(Privately)
Be careful what you wish for, George.
(Whispers)
You might get it.
ASHLEY 17, a shy petite Oriental teenager. Wears designer eyeglasses.
ASHLEY
He's Peter Pan, Mr. Allen -- that's why.
All burst up laughing.
Emily gives Carter a wink.
MR. ALLEN
Can we move on?
Carter returns the favor.
MR. ALLEN (CONT'D)
Behave, Carter. Behave. Why, George?
GEORGE
It's stupid.
CARTER
Look who's talking.
All giggle.
GEORGE
I'm serious, Skip. Growing up sucks, man.
The kids murmur, AD LIB.
MR. ALLEN
He's got a point. Guys. Guys -- He's got a point.
DEBBIE
How?
MR. ALLEN
Well, look at the bright side of growing up, George.
Carter pushes George gently.
MR. ALLEN (CONT'D)
Hey, listen -- at least you get the chance to have total control of your lives.
GEORGE
How?
The bell RINGS.
MR. ALLEN
Well, for one.
The kids start to leave.
NINA
Redhead, redhead fire in the woodshed.
George sticks out his tongue at Nina.
MR. ALLEN
Just a sec. Guys. You need to hear this.
The kids stop at the door.
MR. ALLEN (CONT'D)
Thank you. Well, no one can tell you what to do, George. All of you. No one -- except your future spouses, of course.
All laugh.
MR. ALLEN (CONT'D)
It's your life. Spend it wisely.
The kids leave.
MR. ALLEN (CONT'D)
Have fun.
Emily gives George a noogie.
GEORGE
Stop it.
EXT. CALABASAS HIGH - FLOOR LEVEL - SCHOOLYARD - AFTERNOON
MRS. JONES 65, the principal. A stoic overweight woman with huge bosom. Flanked by two armed security guards.
JAKE 39, a short, fat armed security supervisor. Wears a white shirt.
GALE 35, a square looking armed security guard. Also wears a white security supervisor shirt.
Mrs. Jones points her little stick toward Emily.
PRINCIPAL
Miss Daniel.
Emily stuffs what appears to be a large piece of lingerie in her backpack.
PRINCIPAL (CONT'D)
(Firmly)
Ms. Daniel.
EMILY
Huh? Yes. Yes, Mrs. Jones.
PRINCIPAL
Come here.
Emily inches toward the principal.
EMILY
(Under her breath)
Shit.
PRINCIPAL
I heard that.
EMILY
Damnit.
Emily reaches the principal.
PRINCIPAL
I heard that, too.
Emily MUMBLES.
PRINCIPAL (CONT'D)
What did you say there, mumbles?
EMILY
(Softly)
Nothing.
PRINCIPAL
Speak up.
EMILY
I said nothing.
PRINCIPAL
Don't let me regret not handing you your graduation certificate tomorrow, Young Lady.
Jake stares at Emily.
EMILY
What did I do?
PRINCIPAL
I'm warning you, Ms. Daniel.
EMILY
I didn't do anything, Mrs. Jones.
PRINCIPAL
I know what you and your clique are up to, Emily -- better be careful.
Mrs. Jones looks at Carter.
PRINCIPAL (CONT'D)
I'll be watching you, Emily.
Mrs. Jones points at the two security guards.
PRINCIPAL (CONT'D)
They'll be watching you.
EMILY
I didn't do anything.
Mrs. Jones waves her little stick.
PRINCIPAL
You can leave now. C'mon -- move along.
Emily leaves.
PRINCIPAL (CONT'D)
Mr. Thornton.
MR. THORNTON 65, a custodian, wears a state issued overall. Pushes a cleaning cart. Stops.
PRINCIPAL (CONT'D)
Did you clean the Cafeteria area like I told you?
EXT. CALABASAS HIGH - FLOOR LEVEL - COURTYARD - DAY
Carter plays snakes on a Nokia early design cell phone.
Emily snatches the phone from Carter's hand.
EMILY
Give me back my phone.
CARTER
Take it easy, Em. Damn.
EMILY
You'll kill the battery playing that stupid game, Skip -- look -- two bars.
Carter passes Mr. Thornton.
CARTER
So?
EMILY
So what?
CARTER
Did you get it?
Emily nods.
GEORGE
Get what? Get what?
EMILY
Right from her locker.
CARTER
Damn. Lemme see.
GEORGE
See what?
EMILY
Tonight, Skip. Tonight.
GEORGE
Tonight what?
DEBBIE
The...
Emily gently, smacks Debbie on the back of the head.
DEBBIE (CONT'D)
Ouch.
EMILY
What are you doing?
DEBBIE
I wanna tell'm about tonight.
GEORGE
Tell me what?
EMILY
Not now, Deb -- you know him. He's...
DAVE 18, a cool geek handsome, naturally tanned young man, wears dark sunglasses.
DAVE
(Sings)
Mrs. Jones, Mrs. Jones, Mrs. Jones.
Dave removes his Walkman headphone. Snatches George's cap off.
DAVE (CONT'D)
He's a big mouth.
GEORGE
(Protests)
Hey.
Dave slaps George's belly with the cap, as he offers his fist to Carter.
DAVE
Wassup, Skip?
Carter and Dave touch fists.
CARTER
Wassup with you, Dave?
Carter gets George's head in an elbow lock and gives him a noogie. Grimaces in imitation of the principal.
CARTER (CONT'D)
I'm watching you, George. I'm watching you.
GEORGE
For what? What did I do?
EXT. CALABASAS HIGH - FRONT PARKING LOT - CONTINUOUS
The kids reach the busy parking lot. Long line of cars with kids jumping inside of them.
Emily walks up to a black Mercedes sedan with both of her parents waiting in it.
EMILY
Ten sharp, Skip. Don't forget.
Carter waves back as he walks up to his beat-up car.
CARTER
I won't. See ‘a when I see ‘a.
A Camouflage painted pickup truck, tires squealing, and slams on the brakes near Carter.
Carter jumps back.
CARTER (CONT'D)
Watch where you're going, stupid. Damn.
CODY 20, a pale baldheaded young man. Pierced and tattooed all over, sits behind the wheel. Wears black coat.
CODY
Scared ‘a?
HELEN 18 wears a black, bushy 1950's hair style, yellow 1970's era dress and shiny stretch pants. Opens the door of Cody's monster tires car.
Most male students gather and wait for her to climb into the monster wheels truck to watch.
Cody pulls her up.
CODY (CONT'D)
Helen. Helen, I scared him.
The male students giggle; give each other high-5.
Carter grabs his crotch before he opens his car's door.
CARTER
Scare this, you fucking dropout piece of shit.
Cody snickers as he gives Carter the finger.
CODY
Helen? Did you see that? He jumped like.
(To Carter)
A chicken.
Cody imitates a chicken.
Helen now seated next to Cody.
HELEN
Shut up, Cody.
Helen leans over Cody and peers down from the 80's beat up monster tires truck.
HELEN (CONT'D)
Hey, Skip. We're still on for tonight, right?
Carter gets in the car.
CARTER
If you two morons survive until then. Yeah.
Cody speeds off, gives Carter the finger. Passes the school sign.
EXT. COUNTRY ROAD (CALABASAS HIGH SCHOOL ROAD) - NIGHT
Full bold moon with a visceral glow, partially peeks from behind thick clouds. It reveals long antennas and flashing strobes on a speeding SUV rover below.
Like playing hide-and-seek, the flashing strobes of the speeding SUV rover disappear and reappear through thicket and bushes bordering a narrow snaky canyon road.
EXT. CALABASAS HIGH - FRONT PARKING LOT - NIGHT
George peeps his sweet face from behind a tree. He wears a funny oversize tempered glass diving goggles. Scans the creepy place.
INSERT - ...June 10, 2004 [Flashes three times].
The remainder of the ad flashing on the LED sign in front of the school's parking lot gives the deserted school campus a chilling reddish effect.
With the exception of the steady FIZZING sound of the sign engine, distant crickets CHIRPING, all is silent.
George pulls the goggles over his forehead. It exposes two black "athlete lines" drawn under each eye.
George's neon candy color clothes exposes him as he lurches across the dark parking lot.
Constantly, George keeps pulling up his dragging baggy pants, while he holds on to a can of spray paint in each hand.
An Owl SCREECH sounds like a woman screaming in the woods.
Scared, George runs away, trips a few times.
George diving goggles falls off. He disappears into the night.
EXT. CALABASAS HIGH - ADMINISTRATION OFFICE FRONT - NIGHT
In front of the school's poorly lit administration office, Emily hangs panties, bras and jock straps on tree branches.
Carter wears a porkpie hat, loiters around. Jokingly, he presses an oversize frilly bra against his chest.
CARTER
You whoo.
EMILY
Who'd have thunk it?
CARTER
What do you think, Em?
EMILY
Very funny, but we have to -- The locks, Carter. The locks.
Carter walks up to the administration's office door, starts to pick the lock.
CARTER
(Salutes)
Yes sergeant.
George cuts through a yellow police tape tied to a tree and a pole.
Emily runs away.
EMILY
Jesus.
George laughs.
GEORGE
It's me -- come back, Em. It's me.
Emily stops returns.
EMILY
Don't do that again, man. You scared the hell out of me.
The lock RELEASES.
CARTER
Viola.
Emily and George look on.
CARTER (CONT'D)
We're in.
The kids enter the building, at the same time...
EXT. CALABASAS HIGH - FRONT PARKING LOT - NIGHT
The security rover drives into the parking lot. The rover license plate reads: GOTTCHA 2.
The spotlight mounted on the side of the rover pans around the deserted foggy parking lot. Nothing.
INT. ADMINISTRATION OFFICE - HALLWAY - NIGHT
Carter passes George and Emily.
CARTER
Watch and learn, suckers.
Carter bends down to pick the principal's office lock.
Emily arrives, reaches over him, and turns the doorknob. Pushes the door wide open. Looks back at Carter.
EMILY
This ain't no bank, stupid.
Carter is dumbfounded.
George bursts out laughing.
Carter stares at him, shoves him inside.
CARTER
Shut up.
EXT. CALABASAS HIGH - FRONT PARKING LOT - NIGHT
Through the light fog, the security rover slowly rolls through the parking lot of the creepy campus. Stops next to the oversize tempered glass diving goggles.
The door of the rover opens. A gloved hand reaches down and grabs the goggles. Closes the door.
On the rover's driver side door, under the security company's logo: SUPERVISOR ROVER is visible.
E/I. ROVER - CONTINUOUS
Through the dim light in the rover and surroundings, sitting in the driver's seat, Jake's angry face looks scary, as he inspects the goggles.
INT. PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE - NIGHT
Emily shakes a can of spray paint.
EMILY
Showtime.
Emily pans the spray can. Her painting fogs the wall and the surveillance camera.
EXT. CALABASAS HIGH - ADMINISTRATION OFFICE FRONT - MOMENTS LATER
Jake passes a beat-up pickup truck with "the few, the proud, the Marines” Bumper sticker. Drives away.
Around the school's corner, Jake spots a hidden Olive-green SUV. He points the side spotlight toward the license plate. It reads: GOTTCHA.
INT. PRINCIPAL'S OFFICE - MOMENTS LATER
Emily finishes drawing something on a picture.
EMILY
Viola.
George laughs.
GEORGE
Skip. Skip. Look. Bin Laden.
George Bush's picture has a new middle-Eastern Gulf headdress, moustache and a beard.
Carter laughs.
CARTER
No, George. Been drinking.
All giggle.
GEORGE
That reminds me, man -- did you get the stuff, Skip?
Carter taps on his shirt pocket.
CARTER
Lata. Lata my dear fat friend. Lata.
George moves to the light switch and attempts to...
Emily slaps George's hand off.
GEORGE
Ouch.
EMILY
What the hell you think you're doing, G?
GEORGE.
I, I -- I was trying.
EMILY
Ahuh.
GEORGE