What are people saying?
“Over the past year I have been reading Deborah Calla’s blog on a regular basis. It has been a constant amazement to me how she can pick a topic that relates to herself and have it resonate in the hearts of thousands. Her insightful outlook on life, presented from the perspective of her heart, not a textbook, is one I believe as a therapist, could help thousands of people if they were given access to her words. I do and will continue to refer others to her blog and this book to read”
—Jody Fink LMFT
“I’ve been reading your thoughts over the past few days and thank you for sharing your wisdom. I have been going through a difficult few months relation-wise and have been seeking just such positive insights into living a life well”
—Lisa (Miami)
“I just wanted to thank you for being a source of inspiration! I found your blog during one of the most challenging and transitional times of my life. What I find most amazing is that I don’t read or follow it consistently, but do have it bookmarked as a favorite. Ironically, whenever I do click the tab, your entries almost mirror the situation in my life and give me the bravery, peace or passion/push on this great journey of life. I am definitely finding my voice again as a 33 yr old woman and hope my note blesses you as your blog has done for me!”
—Tiffani (Los Angeles)
“Just had to let you know, I recognize what you have already discovered. Your gifts and talents are super, and I like many others are grateful for them. They are all wrapped up in such an endearing sense of humility that one cannot help but be transformed by your strengths. Thanks again!”
—John (New York)
25 Life Recipes for Happy Living
By Deborah Calla
Copyright © 2012 by Deborah Calla
Smashwords Edition
This eBook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This eBook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews. Please do not participate in or encourage the piracy of copyrighted materials in violation of the author’s rights. Purchase only authorized editions.
ISBN: 978-0-615-58378-5
Cover Design By Tatiana Villa
http://www.wix.com/tat_94/viladesign/contact
Disclaimer
This document is intended to provide information to its readers. It is not intended to provide any kind of medical, psychological, legal, or any other kind of professional advice. This document contains the opinions of its author(s). No warranties or guarantees are expressed or implied by any of the content in this document. Neither the publisher nor the author(s) shall be liable for any physical, psychological, emotional, financial, or commercial damages, including, but not limited to, special, incidental, consequential or other damages resulting from the use of information provided in this document. You are responsible for your own choices, actions, and results.
Life is a beautiful and exciting journey. Don’t let pain define your passage through this earth. Instead let laughter be your calling.
We live to gain wisdom. Every experience—good or bad—is an opportunity to understand the world and ourselves.
“The Yummy Book: 25 Recipes for Happy Living” is the first in a series of books focusing on: living in the present, anger, contentment, ego, letting-go, love, change and sorrow.
Read it all the way through or consult it whenever you need a word of support or inspiration.
In friendship.
Deborah
Calla
Los Angeles, 2012
TABLE OF CONTENTS
PART I—Learning to Love Ourselves
Can You Afford to Be Vulnerable?
Appreciating Who We Are and What We Have
Are You Really Ready for Love?
The Difference between Loneliness and Solitude
Don’t Compare Yourself to Others
Finding Your Own Sense of Well-Being
Are you Entitled to Happiness?
5 Concepts for a More Satisfying Life
How to Transform Grief into Hope
Realize—Execute: The Two Steps of Change
Reconnect with what is Truly Important
Stopping Self-Destructive Behavior
Staying True in Time of Crisis
How to Silence the Inner-Chatter
LEARNING TO LOVE OURSELVES
Ingredients:
• 3 oz fine-quality bittersweet life experience
• 1/3 cup
heavy laughter
• 1 tablespoon of self-respect , softened
•
1/16 teaspoon raspberry love extract
Love is not primarily a relationship to a specific person; it is an attitude, an ordination of character which determines the relatedness of the person to the whole world as a whole, not toward one object of love—Erich Fromm
We often cheat ourselves of quality of life because we don’t see love for what it actually is; a state of being.
Instead we walk around shielding ourselves from any possibility of experiencing it as if sharing love with a friend or a stranger would deplete our finite arsenal. We erroneously believe love is to be saved until we find that one person who will be the recipient of it all.
Love is a quality of life. It is not an emotion which comes into existence when we think we have found a partner. Unfortunately because of that, we live our lives with closed hearts without truly giving or receiving.
It’s sad how we invest so much of our energies looking for love and acceptance without realizing that if we are not willing to commit to opening our hearts, we will never find that which we seek.
Without wanting to be cliché, love is all around us. But to experience it we need to be present and not afraid to “expose” our feelings.
Being open to love means smiling when someone smiles at us. Or better yet initiating a smile because we feel open and alive. It means being compassionate and being of service. Giving without thinking what will I get out of it. It also means laughing with energy and without holding back.
If we open our hearts to life, the love that already exists within will fill our lives with contentment. We won’t be walking around feeling empty and waiting for someone else to fill us up with love. Be your own lover and your life will be filled with love.
Can You Afford To Be Vulnerable?
“If you hold back on the emotions—if you don’t allow yourself to go all the way through them—you can never get to being detached, you’re too busy being afraid. You’re afraid of the pain, you’re afraid of the grief. You’re afraid of the vulnerability that loving entails. But by throwing yourself into these emotions, by allowing yourself to dive in, all the way, over your head even, you experience them fully and completely.”—Mitch Albom
There is a great difference between being tough and being strong. Tough is a posture. Strength is the result of lessons learned and wisdom acquired. Opening our hearts and being vulnerable is a consequence of being strong.