Unpacking Gender. Bergman and Harter, 2003
Unpacking Gender
Description: Two transgendered individuals discuss gender via email and eventually both agree and agree to disagree. Useful and informative writing about the gender system in American culture, as well as a model of generous sharing of ideas and emotions without rancor.
Notes and Disclaimers: This email exchange is offered as a tool for understanding, as it documents a conversation in which two trans people with different thoughts about gender disagree respectfully and eventually find common ground. It is unedited except to correct the usual array of typographical errors that mark passionate email exchange. Neither of us claim to speak for any group, for all transpeople, or for anyone at all except ourselves – this is the unedited record of two individuals hashing it out about sex and gender.
Comments, questions, et al may be forwarded to S. Bear Bergman at:
bear [at] sbearbergman [dot] com.
From:
Dana Lea
Harter
Subject:
Transgender
lesbian
Dear [event organizer],
I am responding to your
post on the [listserv] on the “transgender lesbian.” I am a
POST OP transsexual woman, who is also lesbian. Post-op meaning I
have had sex changes surgery and have a vagina as any other woman.
My question is, is this person a post-op transsexual or just a
crossdresser. To me you can not be a lesbian and have a penis.
If you have a penis you are a man. If you have a vagina you’re
a woman.
And why did you spell
her (hir)? Is this some term to somehow say this is a shemale? Or
something like that? If this person has a penis then this would
be correct. But if this person has had sex reassignment surgery
and has a vagina then they are just another ordinary woman and it
should be spelled HER.
Thank You
Ms Dana Lea Harter
-~-~-~-
From: S. Bear Bergman
Subject: Transgender lesbian/clearing up confusion
Hi. I wanted to take a moment to clear up any confusion regarding either my gender or my sexual orientation.
1. I don’t actually identify as a trans lesbian, but as trans and queer. I choose these identity labels because I feel that they most accurately encompass my desire, behavior, and identity. Within my frame of reference and understanding, transgendered means to transgress or transcend gender, which definitely describes me, and queer suggests that my sexual and romantic partners, or desires, are people of many genders.
2. The idea that genitals are the defining factor of gender - or that there are only two genders - is very troublesome to me, for several reasons. In no particular order, they are: a) the very idea that there are only two genders. I think that there are many more than that, and that the bipolar gender system is deeply flawed. It is plain to me that gender expression happens in a dizzying variety of ways, and I am personally in favor of all of them, whatever gender anyone cares to present. B) sex reassignment surgery is a major expense, and many people do not have access to the 50k+ that is generally costs. I find it hard to approve, implicitly or explicitly, of the idea that money can be a determining factor in gender. C) sex reassignment surgery, as you know, has a lot of health risks, as well as the risk of loss of sexual pleasure or sexual function, and I am not willing to condemn anyone to a gender that they don’t feel is appropriate for them because they won't risk a negative outcome, or would like to be having sexual pleasure in their lives. Please let me be clear - I am not *in any way* against SRS. I am in favor of whatever anyone wants to do to hir own body in order to feel more comfortable in it – surgery, hormones, tattoos, piercings, other body modifications or none at all - all of these are valid ways to express one's chosen gender as far as I'm concerned.