Walking with Shadows
by Julieanne Lynch
Smashwords Edition
Copyright 2011 Julieanne Lynch
Published by Strict Publishing International
Smashwords Edition, License Notes
This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each person you share it with. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then you should return to Smashwords.com and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.
Life’s but a walking shadow, a poor player, that struts and frets his hour upon the stage, and then is heard no more; it is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing. ~ William Shakespeare
Prologue
Dreams
The bird sat on the ground with a broken wing. I could not help but feel sorry for it as it looked aimlessly towards the sky, grieving, and I swear I could see tears fill its eyes. The closer I came to it, the more its face became distorted, and when I finally perched beside it the bird went crazy, squawking and frantically trying to get away from me. Upset, I pulled my hand away, and watched as it pitifully scurried away. From within me, I could sense its panic and desire to escape from me. I was the one being feared.
Shadows fell around me on the barren terrain, and as I struggled to escape the looming darkness I found myself standing alone next to a tree that had been stripped bare of its life. I brushed my hand along the rough trunk and felt a sticky substance. When I bent down to look at it, I could see yellow pulp slowly pumping out of a small hole about the size of a dime. I leaned closer to see it more clearly, and to my horror I saw his eyes staring back at me. The dark, black holes peered out at me, and terror set in and I froze.
Unable to move, I screamed as the shadows descended upon me, each one tearing at me, pulling me apart, but from within me came a surge of power. It was like nothing I had ever experienced.
I held my hands out and closed my eyes, and I felt a warm, tingly sensation rush up my arms. My fingertips burned as if they were on fire. Incandescent heat came from them, burning up everything in sight. Slowly, I opened my eyes, and I saw the shadows gradually disappearing, screaming and shielding their eyes from the light that beamed from my hands.
All around me, the sound of a distant voice echoed, and as I walked towards the light, the familiar voice felt like a thousand suns warming my heart.
Chapter 1
Giselle, can you hear me?” Antoine’s voice echoed through my head as I fought the dizziness of sleep. “It’s time to wake up... Giselle!” he called repeatedly.
I stirred, but found it hard to focus my eyes in the light of the room. It was so bright, and the backs of my eyes stung. I was hazily aware of the electric blue eyes of the dark haired man kneeling in front of me. His gentle smile and whiter-than-snow complexion was a welcome sight, and, as a broad grin swept across his face, his beautiful white fangs glistened in the room’s light.
“Welcome back, sweet Princess,” his velvety voice spoke again.
I coughed, sat up on the bed, and looked around me. “Really?” I said as I cleared my throat. “How long was I out for?” I asked as I stretched my arms, yawning.
“Just a little over…” He paused, counting under his breath. “Nine weeks.” He smiled again.
“What? How is that possible?” I shouted, stunned that I had survived for that long and puzzled by the length of time I had slept, dreamt or whatever it was.
“I had to do what was best for both mother and child,” he remarked, and pointed my direction towards an I.V. line in my arm. A bag of blood hung above it. The bag was almost empty.
“Huh, what’s this for?” I asked, confused, and then felt rather stupid for asking.
“That was to ensure both you and the child received the right sustenance. Plus, I got to play the hero whilst you slept.”
“Yeah? And I bet you really enjoyed that.”
“Well, one would be stupid to deny the obvious, but I have always been a sucker for damsels in distress, especially beautiful Princesses like you.” He was so irritatingly confident and smug.
“Oh, whatever... Just take it out. I’m awake now, so I can take care of myself.” I shook my arm in front of his face and waited for him to remove the line.
As Antoine tended to my arm, I studied the room we were in. It was large and oval shaped, with a round window to the far end. Mirrors of all shapes and sizes adorned the walls, and I could not help but noticed a portrait of a beautiful raven-haired woman. Her deep blue eyes and smoldering skin were unlike any woman I had ever seen, and in the past six months I had come across some very beautiful women. None more so than my ‘mother-in-law’, who had just happened to take an unhealthy interest in me now that I was carrying the child of her adoptive son, Alex. It was because of her that I was on the run for my life. So, something inside me made me very wary about those who had been blessed with such beauty.
“So, where are we?” I asked, half expecting some riddle or the usual half answers that Antoine was so good at delivering.
“We are in a place far from the human world. Of course you already know that, but where exactly depends on how you envisage the Other World. We may very well walk with shadows, but we have angels on our side.”
That was when the woman from the portrait walked into the room, holding a decanter of red liquid. Her hair shone like silk and she moved effortlessly as she glided towards me. Her whole body glowed in a shimmering light, and I was completely dumbfounded by the power of her presence.
“Giselle, I am glad you are well,” she said as she poured some of the red liquid into a silver-rimmed glass and handed it to me.
Taking it from her, I meekly whispered “thanks” and proceeded to take a sip from the familiar scent of tantalizing crimson. It worked a treat, and soon ignited the flame that had been simmering while I slept.
“So, who are you?” I asked as I took another mouthful. This time, I savored the luxury of the thickness, letting it glide down my throat.
“Sweet Princess, this is Ysoriel. She has been our savior,” Antoine proudly declared.
They exchanged a look that spoke a thousand words, and I could not help but feel a little jealous of the adoring gaze they shared.
“Earth to Mars,” I whined sarcastically as I threw my legs out of the bed. “Geez, get a room.”
Antoine looked at me disapprovingly. I hated it when he scolded me as though I were a child.
“Dare to mock me again, and you’ll find yourself back in the land of dreams,” he threatened me with a sparkle of mischief in his eyes.
“Okay! I was only joking,” I said as I stood up, but what happened next scared the living crap out of me, almost literally.
I screamed as I looked down at the bump that was clearly visible beneath my t-shirt. “Holy hell, what’s wrong with me?” I squealed.
“That, sweet Princess, is your unborn child,” Antoine said as he rubbed the bump.
“What? How? It’s only been a few weeks! I mean, does it grow that quickly?” I asked, shocked and disbelieving.
“The child will continue to grow, and at an accelerated rate, just as you will. This is all a part of the divine beauty of life,” Ysoriel said, smiling at me.
“Okay, I think I need to sit down,” I said as I frantically tried to control my breathing.
“Don’t be so scared. This is, after all, something you knew would happen, and besides, I kind of like the new you. It’s heartwarming to see someone so beautiful carry the next generation of our kind. And you will succeed, just as long as you continue to embrace your path,”
“Yeah, easy for you to say. I should be at home, doing stupid girly stuff... not this... oh God, I think I’m going to be sick,” I cried, and as Antoine handed me a basin I threw up.
I did not know if it was panic or pregnancy sickness, but the prospect of my growing baby scared the living daylights out of me, and I was pretty sure that Antoine knew this. He always seemed to calm me, and if it were not for the adoring gaze he gave me I think I would have believed that glamour did not exist. But I knew him and his tricks too well, and this was one of those moments.
“Dear little Princess, I think you ought to calm those nerves, or at least put them on the back burner for a while. You will be fine, I promise you. Have I broken any of my promises yet?” He smiled as he wiped my chin with a silken handkerchief.
“No, you haven’t. Well, not yet, anyway,” I shook my head and whispered.
“All is well. Now come. Let’s get you cleaned up and ready to face the world.” He took me by the hands and helped me and ‘bump’ to my feet.
“Ysoriel will assist you. Don’t be scared. She hasn’t fallen yet,” he said as he winked over to her.
“Fallen? You mean, like an angel?” My voice was a little high pitched, and I struggled to clear it.
“Indeed, child. I am an angel, an archangel, and I can’t see me falling any time soon. Although, there are some who would stop at nothing to see that, but rest assured I am still very much a part of the divine,” she said smoothly as she took me by the hand. I looked back at Antoine who sat smugly in his chair and watched us walk from the room into an unbelievably beautiful garden.
I gasped in awe. I could hardly believe what I was seeing. It was like something out of a picture book, and I think Ysoriel approved of my reaction.
“It’s magnificent, isn’t it?” she gushed as we walked past exotic palm trees, rows and rows of wild ferns, lines of orange, red, pink and red Amaryllis, tulips, ginger and a bedding of orchids. The aroma was amazing, and I inhaled the delicious scent as the mixture of the perfumes spun in circles around my nose.
“What is this place?” I asked.
“This is what I like to call my own little piece of heaven. It is as good as it gets in a world controlled by chaos,” she remarked as her voice lowered.
“So, um, how does an angel know a vampire?” I asked curiously, shifting the direction of the conversation.
“Oh, I guess you could say our paths crossed quite some time ago and we have remained firm friends ever since,”
“Yeah, but I mean, you know. You guys seem to like each other an awful lot,” I said, watching her reaction from the corner of my eye.
“How could we not? We have, after all, shared many remarkable moments together, and some of them have found a permanent place in my heart…” she said, and then paused. “Giselle, may I ask you something?”
“Umm, yeah, sure?” I fidgeted.
“I can see that you have grown quite attached to Antoine, but how do you see your relationship with him?”
“What?” I asked, stunned.
“Do you have any romantic feelings towards him?”
Shocked and embarrassed, I was instantly on the defense.
“Oh, God, no! I could never look at him like that. Besides, have you noticed how awful I look? I’m not exactly desirable at the moment, but no, I could never be anything more than a friend to him,” I lied. “Anyway, it’s not me he loves. I’m right, aren’t I?” I asked and noticed her shifting her gaze back towards the white-edged building we had left.
“Some things remain forbidden, no matter how much the heart desires it,” she said as we walked into a small building at the end of the path.
“I knew it,” I whispered as I realized we were standing in a bizarre looking bathroom.
Large squared windows lined the walls. They were covered discreetly by thin, baby blue colored voiles. A huge rectangle bath sat centre stage in the room, like a pool in the ground. Towards the rear of the room, water flowed over stones, and the gentle stream of water flowed down to the bath where the water gently rippled.
Cushions had been scattered to one corner of the room. Their colors were rich and opulent, quite strange in a place that seemed to mirror the simplicities of life. But I accepted that things were not always as they seemed, and I ignored the questions that almost fell from my mouth.
“You will find all you need in here. There is fresh linen laid out for your use, your clothes are hanging in that closet to your left, and when you’re finished I would love for you to join me for lunch.” She was so serene and elegant that I felt like crying for being so jealous towards her.
“Angels eat?” I asked her, trying not to sound too smug.
“Well, we like to blend in,” she laughed.
“Blend in here?” I remarked sarcastically. “This is a world away from what I’m used to.”
“Even so, I feel it a necessity to make an effort, and sometimes things aren’t as they seem. Giselle, remember the phrase, ‘Never judge a book by its cover’? That applies here.” She smiled at me and left the room.
For a moment, I almost felt afraid to go right into the room. I stood close to the door and looked at the luxurious bath, craving the touch of warm water on my skin. A part of me was frightened of stripping off and seeing the damage caused by Alex. It was not too long ago that I was fighting for my own life after Alex beat me. He had thrown me into the shower cubicle of our room back in Armenia and almost strangled me to death, yet somehow I survived the brutality. I was left with terrible wounds that needed lots of stitching, and to this day I had not seen the results. I guess you could say I was a little naïve to believe that they had gone, and I knew only too well that things just did not disappear. It was going to take time to heal completely, and time was something I would have to learn to accept.
I steadied my nerves and moved to the side of the pool-sized bath, and from there to the opulent cushions that lay on the floor. I sat down on them and observed the room and all its little features. It was like something out of a fairytale. The rich colors of purple and gold almost clashed with the tranquil blue of the voile, but somehow it all came together beautifully. Tiny little drawings hung on the walls behind me, little designs of stars intertwined with silver threads, and right in the heart of the picture I could just about make out the shape of a woman with white feathered wings. It was beautiful.
I exhaled deeply. I was still trying to put off the inevitable, but I knew I had to wash, so, standing up, I loosened the gown that had been put on me whilst I ‘slept’ and let it fall to my feet. I closed my eyes tight, avoiding having to look down at my growing abdomen and the shadow that I knew had grown. But, as always, curiosity got the better of me. Opening one eye, I peeped down at my breasts and saw how they had grown, and between them the darkness spread down and rested on the top of my now protruding baby bump. I grimaced as I stared at the neat, round shape. I knew the child was Alex’s, and I hated having a part of him growing within me. Yet, somehow, I knew I would love the baby, no matter what.
I went over to the side of the bath and stepped in, slowly lowering myself into and under the warm water. I let it flow over my head, washing away the stains of the past nine weeks, and then I lay floating on my back, clearing my mind of all its stress, and that was when it happened for the first time.
Chapter 2
My baby moved inside, like little butterfly wings brushing against the wall of my womb. It was scary and amazing. Jumping to my feet, I silently willed my child to move again.
My heart pounded in my chest as a wave of excitement ran through me. It was the most unusual sensation I had ever experienced, and, resting a hand on my small round abdomen, I rubbed gently, completely spellbound.
“I know you’re in there,” I whispered to my abdomen.
Patiently, I waited for my baby to move again, and minutes passed before the gentle flutter happened. A buzz of excitement flowed through me. I knew it was impossible for my child to understand me, but these were not normal circumstances and I believed that the unbelievable could happen.
I lay floating on the water with my hand on my bump, smiling. I stared at the ceiling, thinking about Alex and how all of this was his fault, yet something stopped me from thinking about him and it was not the baby moving. It was the gentle rustle of a breeze from the window.
The voiles moved like waves as warm air filled the room, and before I had a chance to get out of the water a strange mist began to fill the area around me.
I waded through the water and silently out of it, and I grabbed a nearby robe from a wooden bench. Slipping it on, I heard noises that sounded like giggling. Scared, I tried to make my way to the door, but lost my footing and fell to the ground. I fell hard on the solid marble floor and winced in pain. I tried to sit upright, but the pain in my wrist ached and I cursed.
“Damn it,” I cried out as I moved my hand up to my face.
“Are you okay?” a child’s voice echoed around the room.
Looking around the room, I saw nothing but the increasing mist that left the area around me white.
“Are you hurt? Should we get someone to help?” another child spoke.
“Err... I think, I’m okay,” I stuttered.
Slowly, three little white silhouettes appeared before me, and I could see the shapes of three small children: two girls and a boy. They each had golden hair that shone like the brilliance of the sun. They stared at me, smiling, watching my every move, and as I tried to get to my feet, the tallest of the three, a blue-eyed girl came to my side and took my sore hand in hers. Her hands were cold like ice and the pain shot up my arm into my shoulder. Closing her eyes, she mumbled something, and smiled down at me. In what seemed like only seconds, the pain began to decrease. As she released her grip on me, she tilted her head sideways and stared hard into my eyes. Her gaze was fixed on mine, and it felt as though she was reading my soul. For a split second, I lost myself in her glorious blue eyes, and I found myself becoming drowsy.
“You will make a wonderful mommy,” she said confidently as she let go of my hand.
“Oh...!” I barely replied.
I was amazed at how someone so tiny had removed so much pain from me and then read my mind as if it was an open book.
“Who are you?” I asked as I got to my feet and pulled the robe tighter around me, shielding my modesty from the eyes of the children.
The little boy giggled and hid behind the girl beside him.
“We are the children of the Seraphim. I am Aurelia, and this is my sister Sabina and our brother Caius,” Aurelia said.
She stood in front of me like an angel, her golden hair sparkling in the strong light that now shone bright in the room.
“The children of the Seraphim? What is that? Is that like some otherworldly organization?” I asked with an irritated tone to my voice.
“No, silly. It only means that we bear the mark of Gabriel and, well, you can see for yourself.” Aurelia smiled and held onto my hand.
But she was right. They were different. Their small, chubby, childlike frames reminded me of biblical cherubs, but they had no wings and were not as ugly as some of the pictures I had seen at Sunday school.
“Well, you are certainly not like any kids I’ve seen before. But I guess nothing in my life is normal any more.”
Aurelia squeezed my hand and pulled me, and I followed her.
“Where are you taking me?” I asked as I was led out through the door and back into the brilliance of the exotic garden, and instantly the infusion of scents hit me hard in the face and left me craving for more.
“Look!” Caius said as he pointed towards the far end of the garden.
Antoine walked among the ferns, and looked to be in deep thought. The light reflected of his dark black hair and his face was pale against the forest green shades of the foliage.
“Am I supposed to be looking at someone or something other than him?”
“No! It is he who will lead you to your rightful place in destiny. Place your trust in Antoine and you will find inner peace.”
Sabina walked up beside me and gently placed her hand on my chest. “We can feel your pain, Giselle, but I think now that the baby has shown you its first glimmer of life you will learn to embrace what the Gods have chosen for you.”
“The Gods? For Pete’s sake, I think the Gods have screwed around with me for long enough. Don’t you think? Anyway, what has it got to do with you?” I folded my arms and turned to face the three of them, only to be faced by silence and a view of the house I had not seen before now.
It was a magnificent castle, set on the cliffs of what appeared to me some magical world. Three moons glimmered high in the sky as the sun sent its rays down on the beautiful garden around me.
The three children had disappeared and I found myself feeling ridiculous, and in stubborn fashion I began to make my way back to the bizarrely placed bathroom, only to have my attention stolen from Antoine.
“Now I see why some might say you have lost your faculties, but I myself am partial to a little erratic behavior. I trust that you have bathed and conjured up enough energy to consume something of a more balanced nature?” he dryly remarked, raising an eyebrow as he caught a glimpse of my bare legs.
“Well, actually, I...” I started, only to pause, because the truth sounded absolutely ridiculous. “I wanted some fresh air. There’s no law against that, is there?”
“No, of course not, but one might suggest maybe covering up and not showing so much flesh. Not that I am complaining, but others might see it as being brazen,” he smiled, and waited for me to realize what he meant.
I tugged at the robe and looked down at myself, and was suddenly flustered on seeing the gaping neckline of the robe. It had revealed a good amount of breast and, embarrassed, I pulled at the material and covered my chest.
“Don’t look at me like that.”
He laughed in defense.
“You could have said something earlier, you know.”
“I could have, but I am, after all, a man, and it would have been rude of me to deny myself a quick fancy,”
“Pervert,” I hissed as I turned my back on him and walked back towards the bathroom.
“That may very well be, but I, my sweet Princess, believe that there are worse things I could be. And besides, you have nothing to be ashamed of. I have seen you in all your fine glory,” he teased.
Flinging the door shut with a bang, I angrily paced up to the closet and pulled out the clothes that had been neatly hung. I found some underwear, a pair of black leggings, and a black and white striped top.
I dressed in record time and hastily pulled my hair back from my face and tied it tight in a ponytail. I had all but forgotten the mirror, and I stopped to check out my growing abdomen that now looked huge in comparison to my usual slight frame. My small bump stuck out enough that you could tell I was pregnant and it was not simply the result of overeating. And, thinking about food made me crave the usual combination of blood and baked goodies.
* * * * *
Casually I walked back towards the Gothic-shaped castle, which had layers of ivy and red blooms with yellow throats creeping up the walls and beyond the roof. The foliage was feathery and looked so delicate against the harsh spikes of the ivy. Around the windowsills, small clusters of purple flowers sat against the backdrop of the bolder and luxuriant bright chartreuse greens, pink and white. It was a beautiful ensemble and I could not have felt more at home.
I stood staring up into the bright blue sky and noticed there were no clouds, only the three bizarre moons and the gentle rays of the sun that brushed against my cheek. Closing my eyes, I inhaled the deeply scented air that surrounded me and relished the peace that came with not knowing where I was.
“It’s wonderful, isn’t it?” Ysoriel said from behind me. “It reminds me of how the earth stood before man and evolution destroyed what once was pure.”
“Is any of this real?” I turned to face her. “I mean, it just seems too good to be true. I have never seen anything like this... It just makes me wonder,” I said, shrugging my shoulders.
“Giselle, this is all very real. It is something I have harbored from the beginning of time. Unfortunately, time has destroyed a lot of my world. It was once a lot grander than this. It was magnificent, and I was held in awe by many of my kind, but so many things come to an end eventually,”
“So, you’re telling me that all this will be gone one day too?”
“I fear that my time on this Earth is coming to an end. I believe that all good will succumb to the evil that ensues.” There was a deep sadness in her voice and I could feel her anguish at the thought of losing her piece of heaven.
“That’s so sad. Can’t, you know, the man upstairs, not do anything to help?” I asked naively, pointing towards the flawless sky above.
Ysoriel laughed and placed her arm around my shoulder.
“Everything divine is not determined by, as you put it, ‘the man upstairs’. We are each in control of our own destiny. That is something you will see and experience for yourself. But right now I think you need some refreshments, and Antoine has been kind enough to organize something of a more balanced meal.”
She took me by my hand and led back inside the house.
* * * * *
Antoine sat in his usual manner. One arm rested at the back of his head, whilst his free hand held a goblet. He watched me, seemingly amused, and I for one felt uneasy when he was in this mood. Sitting animatedly, his smile became more prominent as I moved closer to him. Yet, his expression remained the same, still and ornament-like, and if it were not for his moving index finger and the curl of his lips, you might have mistaken him for a statue.
Pausing, I inhaled deeply as a sudden twinge of dizziness came to me. Had he not moved quickly, I think I would have collapsed in a heap on the ground.
“Don’t you ever get tired of rescuing me?” I asked as he laid me down on a luxurious soft couch.
“Of course not. This is what makes my job all the more fulfilling.”
“Well, don’t expect me to do anything in return any time soon,”
“Dearest Giselle, you do make me laugh,” he bellowed and laughed raucously.
I rested my head back against the soft cushions and closed my eyes. At that precise moment, a sudden wave of sadness came over me. I longed for Leonid and I slowly felt the tears escape from my eyes.
“What brings this on?” Antoine asked as he sat down beside me.
“It’s nothing,” I sniffed through my silent sobs.
“You can’t lie to me, Giselle. I know you better than you think.”
“I just... I... I really miss him. I wish he was here to help me through all this,” I sobbed.
Antoine took my left hand in his and held it firmly. “I know your heart longs for him. But I am here. I will help carry your burdens.”
“How, Antoine? You want to know something, I felt this baby move for the first time today and I had no one to share it with. I was completely alone and now I wish... I just wish that I had died along with him, because I may as well be dead.”
“How can you say that?” he said with fear in his eyes.
“Oh, it gets pretty easy when you have lost all hope,” I said, feeling very sorry for myself.
“I think you’re being childish and irresponsible, and I know that it is probably grief talking but that does not take the hurt away. Remember, Leonid’s blood runs through your child’s veins. He is not only a product of Alexander’s but the whole Baranski bloodline.”
“Yeah I know that... but…” I paused and sat upright. “I just feel like I’m going to go through all this to end up completely alone again. I don’t know how I’ll cope if I have no one.” I sighed, closing my eyes.
Antoine rested his hand on my lower back and whispered softly in my ear. It felt almost unreal. “As long as there is breath in my lungs, I will never leave your side, and if something ever happened, I would search for you and kill those in my way.”
Chapter 3
Marc
The rain had left much of the football stadium a swamp and the game against Duluth had been canceled, and to be honest I was pretty relieved. My mind had not been in the game since Giselle left, and a part of me was always a million miles away. I could not help thinking about that one night we had had together. She felt so good to me, and every inch of my heart and soul ached for her, just to have her lips on mine again, but something told me things would never be normal again - ever.
Leaving the shower room, I was making my way down past Coach Tanner’s room when the same feeling came over me. It was like I was not alone, as though there were eyes watching me, always lurking in nooks and crannies, and I swear if it had not had been for Aaron I think I would have shit my pants.
“You heading over to that party Andy’s been bragging about all week?” Aaron asked as he pulled his bag over his shoulder.
“I really haven’t thought about it.”
“Oh man, get with it. Imagine all the skirt you’ll get. You have no idea how much the girls want you after seeing you and Stokes getting down and dirty,” Aaron chuckled.
“Seriously, dude, cut it out. I’ve had enough bull crap to last me a lifetime.”
“Marc, G, has gone. She’s probably off doing hell knows whatever and you have to get past that. Dude, we’re in college. We’re in the prime of our lives. Live a little.”
We walked from Blakeslee Stadium out past the practice fields and across the road to the Gage Center. My truck was parked close to the grass intersection between the softball court and the Center. The autumn evening was slowly becoming dull, and it was just shortly after four. The chill of the air caught my breath as I shouted over to Aaron when he was climbing on his bike.
“I’ll give you a call later.”
“No problem. Just, you know, learn to chill a little, man,” Aaron said as he put his helmet on and started up his bike. The engine roared, and without any hesitation he sped off onto Ellis Avenue and way out of sight.
Unlocking the driver’s side of my truck, I noticed that not too many people were about.
Normally, the place would be jam packed, but the wind and rain had scared a lot of people away. Most of the faculty ran for cover and were most likely warm and cosy in their dorms and not out here like an ass.
I climbed into my truck and started the engine. I was so lost in thought that I did not acknowledge the silhouette approaching me that I could see from the corner of my eye. The shadow slowly disappeared as I turned my head to scan the area from the side of the truck. There was nothing; just the puddles left from the downpour. I swung the truck out from the lot, headed north up Ellis Avenue and turned right down Stadium Road. I drove fast until I turned left onto Warren Street and then straight on up to Riverfront Drive that led me onto Old Highway 22. I kept going north, and continued driving until I was clear of Mankato and everything that reminded me of my life.
* * * * *
Something had always struck me odd about Alex, and I knew that he was more than likely behind Giselle leaving. I knew full well that I had played a part in her running away, and that is something I would always be ashamed of. But Evie was the complete opposite of what I found attractive in girls. I mean, she was always, and probably still is, overly flamboyant and loved herself way too much. I for one could never be with someone like that, but damn, that night at Alex’s I lost control. I keep on reliving that night over and over, trying to figure out what went wrong and how I let myself fall victim to his plans, but like always I end up hitting my head against a brick wall and come up with the square root of nothing.
Alex and I never really swung in the same circles. In fact, he could not have been more different to me. I was always focused and driven, knowing where I was going in life, and I knew that Giselle would play a major role in it. I was crazy about her. She was the cutest girl at school, quiet and reserved and totally everything a guy could ask for in a girlfriend. She had so much life and it radiated off her, and people just fell for her. I can remember the exact moment I fell in love with her. There she sat with her back up against the trunk of the oldest tree in the schoolyard. Her head was down as she wrote in one of her many journals, the light of the sun highlighting the natural tones of copper that flowed through her long, thick hair and her skin was like blends of vanilla and caramel. She was completely beautiful, and it was then that my heart skipped a thousand beats and I knew she would be mine.
I could not believe it when Andy had suggested turning up at some party they had heard about through Jake’s girlfriend. I thought it was crazy to just turn up uninvited, but Alex welcomed us into his father’s penthouse with open arms and I thought nothing of it.
There was an unusual mix of people. I recognized some of the guys from school, but like most school cliques we did not talk and I did not know any of their names. There were a lot of college kids who seemed to indulge quite freely in the flowing alcohol, and that was where I made my mistake. I started drinking beers at first, quenching my growing thirst that seemed insatiable, and then I moved onto the vodka, and drank that down neat without any mixers. I remember the music blaring and watched some of the girls dancing together provocatively and, guys being guys, we loved it.
That was when Alex and Evie came over to where Andy and I were sat. Evie had just rolled a joint and passed it round the group. I had never smoked pot before, but I felt invincible and just rolled with the rest of them. I inhaled the mixture and tried my best not to cough up too much, and to the amusement of everyone else, I think I turned green.
“Marc, dude, you got to inhale it and let it flow down gently,” Andy laughed as he took the joint from me and demonstrated the correct way of smoking weed.
“Oh Andy, you’re such a tease,” Evie chortled as she threw her head back and laughed.
“Well, well, Marc. I never had you down as the sort of guy to just, oh, you know, let his hair down,” Alex remarked as he took a drag of the joint.
“Why’s that?” I asked.
“It’s pretty obvious you’re under the thumb. Giselle has really got you under her spell, hasn’t she?”
“I wouldn’t go as far as saying I’m under the thumb, but yeah, I’m hooked on her. I don’t see the problem.”
Evie laughed out loud and made a really unattractive noise as she mocked me. “Marc, what is it with those chastity rings anyway? We all know she’s frigid. You need a real woman, someone who can show you how good it feels to be touched.”
I could feel knots beginning to tighten in the pit of my stomach and wanted to get out of there.
“It’s true, isn’t it?” Andy asked.
“What?”
“That she won’t even let you go to first base with her,” he laughed and rubbed his hands together, pleased that he had embarrassed me.
Alex sat back and looked at me, smiling as he took a sip of liquor from his glass. Evie began to move closer to me, and slowly I could feel her warm breath at my neck.
“Wh...What the hell are you doing?”
“Just trying to loosen you up a bit,” she purred in my ear.
“No... Just stop... Evie, just get off me,”
“Marc, relax. Enjoy yourself. You never know when the chance will arise again,” Alex said as he got up from his chair. “What happens here stays here. No one needs to know.”
I knew full well what was going on, and even though I did not want to have full-blown sex with her, I could not resist the temptation. I remember Alex watching the moments leading up to the encounter. He looked as though he was having the time of his life. He laughed and joked with a few of the guys, but all the while his attention and gaze were fixed on me.
Andy was laughing as Alex pulled him from the sofa and led him into another room. I tried to take control of the situation but found it impossible to resist. I had lost all control of my senses, and in its place I was filled with desire and want.
Evie’s lips slowly found their way to mine, and as her soft mouth touched me I closed my eyes and found myself lost in the embrace. My tongue moved inside her mouth, tasting her sweetness and, grabbing a hold of her head, I pulled her closer to me. The kiss intensified to the point that I thought I was going to explode then and there. Sensing this, she pulled away from me and unfastened my jeans, sliding them down over my knees. Pulling off her tank top, she revealed her white lace bra, and she removed her panties from under her skirt. I could not take my eyes of her breasts, and I cupped them in my hand.
As I kissed the nape of her neck, she straddled me and it was then I realized there was no turning back. She moved on top of me, holding onto my shoulders, closing her eyes as she made small moans. I held on to her hips and moved her faster, feeling the sensation building up, and my own breathing quickening.
Shaking on top of me, she threw her head back and yelled out, and then it was all too easy to let go. We both made noises that I had not experienced before and I lost all sense of time and reality. Shuddering, I held her still on me as my breathing began to steady. As I opened my eyes, the horror of what I had just done hit me hard in the face.
* * * * *
Shame comes in many forms, and for me, self-destruction was the only way. I suppose you could say that I had it coming to me. Maybe I was losing my mind, or maybe it was now in the hands of the fates and I was going to reap exactly what I was owed.
I sat in the truck for well over an hour, unable to move. The storm looked like it had followed me back home, and sitting outside the Bergman’s did not make me feel any better. The street was empty and the water down by the lake heaved back and forth from the force of the wind.
With the music blaring from the stereo, I hardly heard the wind pick up its pace, but something crashed hard against the side of the truck. Jumping around in my seat, I froze when I looked out the window. Beyond the trees at the side of the Bergman’s, I could just about make out the yellow glow of eyes staring back at me. Blinking in disbelief, I moved forward in my seat and stared harder, straining my eyes and trying to figure out what I was looking at.
Then it was gone. There was nothing except the rain and the wind blowing the hanging branches violently. I let out my breath and tried to relax, when again, only this time my truck almost fell to the side and the scraping noise of metal burst through my ears. I roared in pain, holding my hands over my head, but the noise just kept on getting louder and louder until suddenly there was nothing, only the slightest humming in my ear. Everything around me seemed the same, only time seemed to have slowed down and confusion set in. I toyed with the volume on the stereo but heard nothing. I sounded the horn, but only felt the vibrations. A ringing began to fill my head, and my own voice became mute.
I was completely deaf.
“Marcus,” a voice whispered and left me dizzy.
Getting out of the truck, I looked around trying hard to focus on the front of the Bergman’s, only to fall hard on the wet ground beneath me.
“Marcus,” the voice became louder and echoed through my head. “Marcus, Marcus, Marcus... Marcus,” it repeated hauntingly.
Completely motionless and lying on the ground, I held my hands over my ears, trying my best to rid my head of the voice. But the pain spread throughout me and left my skull ready to explode. With it, coldness began to take a firm grip on me, spreading the whole way up from my feet through to my head. It felt as though I was being submerged in icy water. The air seemed to be draining out of my lungs and I was choking as though on the ice cold water, and I was ready to give in, and at that moment the coldness to be replaced by something different: torturous heat. It started from inside me, and it slowly began to burn through to the surface. I could feel my skin sizzle and the smell of burning flesh hit the back of my nose.
The pain was unbearable and finally I gave in. I screamed out in agony and opened my eyes to see the concerned face of Geoff Bergman staring down at me.
“Marc, what’s wrong?” he asked me as he knelt down by my side.
Realising half the street was out, watching, I sat upright and ran my hands through my hair.
Marilyn stood at the door, her sad eyes watched me, and, realising I had probably made things worse for her, I got to my feet and turned my back on them both.
“Marc, I’ve called your father. He’ll be here soon. Come into the house,” he coaxed me.
“No, honestly, Mr. Bergman, it’s probably just exhaustion. I’m sorry,” I said, embarrassed.
Giselle’s father stood with his arms folded, and the same stern look I had seen many times before swept across his face. I knew I was not getting out of this one.
I walked up the path and to the doorway. Looking back at my truck, I saw it was upright and there was not a scratch in sight. I was confused by what had just happened and was pretty much convinced I was really losing my mind.
Chapter 4
Antoine smiled at me as he cut deep into the flesh that sat just under his collarbone. The thin line slowly released a small trickle of blood. The aroma filled every sense in my body and instantly I desired it, my thirst almost on fire. But, alarmed by what he was doing, I shook the thoughts out of my head and shouted at him in a rage.
“What the hell do you think you’re doing?”
Laughing, he pulled me by my wrists towards him, doing what he did best. My nerves and anger calmed and my thirst for his blood became overwhelming. Smouldering woodsy scents mixed with cognac and caramel brushed the insides of my nostrils. They teased me and danced around my head and, without much more resistance, I allowed him to lower my head down to the line of blood waiting to be consumed.
I parted my lips and slipped my tongue out, and lightly brushed it along the trickling blood. Its syrupy texture was luxurious, and it awakened my hunger that I had kept under control since being with Alex. I pressed my mouth over the open wound, and Antoine shifted position slightly and ran his hand through my hair.
I drank hard. The sweet blood filled my mouth and slid down my throat as I swallowed fast, not wanting to waste a drop. I had never once believed that drinking from him would be so euphoric, but this was something out of my wildest dreams. And for a moment, my thoughts shifted to something else, something I had never considered before: sex with him. Shocked and disgusted by the playing visions in my head, I pulled away from him sharply.
Sitting upright, I refused to look him in the eye. I always had a soft spot for him. I owed him my life, many times over, but this, this was wrong and left me uncomfortable. But, in his usual manner, he was cool and casual and did not show any signs of embarrassment. If anything, he was the opposite.
“Mmm, I had almost forgotten the pleasures of having someone drink from me,” he purred.
“Are you for real?” I shrieked.
“Dearest Giselle, believe it or not, but it has been a very long time since I last allowed someone to taste my blood, let alone drink from me, and I have to say that it was most delicious.” He winked at me.
“Oh my God, I can’t believe you just let me do that. I mean... it’s wrong... you did that ‘thing’ again and took my willpower away. That is so unfair, Antoine, and you know it.”
He sat forward and took me by the hand, kissing the back of it gently. “It is only wrong if you allow it to be. Would you not rather feed from me knowing that I willingly give my blood to you, or would you rather it were a stranger who has no ties to you or your child? The choice is yours, Giselle, but I’d much prefer to share my blood with you than seeing you with another.”
He loosened his grip on my hand and buttoned up the opened shirt. Running a hand through his silky smooth hair, he smiled at me, and then bent down and kissed me on my forehead. He whispered in my ear.
“You have a permanent place in my heart.” His voice felt like velvet against my skin.
He walked away and left the room, and I sat in silence on my own.
Antoine had a way of getting under my skin, whether I liked it or not. And, right then, I was pretty much convinced I was letting my heart rule my head. Knowing it was more than likely just loneliness or my grief over losing Leonid, I still found it so easy to fall into the same self-destructive mode that seemed to fit in so perfectly well with my newfound life.
Sitting there and thinking made the situation seem so much worse than it actually was, and trying to clear my head of my thoughts I got up and walked over to the large bay window that overlooked the enormous plush garden. I still found it hard to believe that this was anything but a trick of the eye or some weird magic that I had yet to discover, but the beauty was all too real.
The sweet scents that danced and playfully tickled the back of my nose were anything but a dream. Up until now, I had not really adapted to my new life, but being here and feeling safe, I could have easily settled to spend the rest of my life here. But, as always, well, in my life anyway, things change, and sometimes that change happens when I least expected it.
* * * * *
Sometime later as I walked through the many halls of the amazing house, I noticed a black oval-shaped door, which seemed oddly out of place. Not taking much notice of its position, I decided to be nosey and turned the knob. From behind me, a warm gentle breeze brushed the bare skin on my arms, moving its way up to my face. Turning round, I saw the same three faces I had been greeted with in the bathroom.
“Think before you go in,” Aurelia said as she moved towards me.
“Think? What about? It’s only a door,” I chortled.
“Yes, but don’t you suppose the door is closed for a reason?” Sabina asked, raising her voice.
Caius nudged the small girl’s arm and a frown spread across her face.
“What’s behind this door?” I asked.
Caius moved up beside me and sighed. “It is not that we mean to frighten you. It’s just that maybe now you aren’t ready to embrace or accept what you may meet on the other side.”
“Oh for Pete’s sake stop talking in riddles and be more honest with me,” I growled.
I twisted the handle in my hand and the door edged open. Cool air escaped from the crack in the doorway and rushed past me. Panicking, the children vanished and I stood on my own, apprehensive about what lay ahead. I took a deep breath, pushed the door open, and walked inside.
A blue tinged haze met me as I silently entered the small box room. Upon the back wall, a single white sheet covered something.
I went over to it and tugged gently on the silky sheet, and then watched as it fell onto the stone floor beneath my feet. Looking up, I was greeted by my own reflection. Startled, I moved back from the mirror and felt my heart thump hard against my chest. I looked like me; my face was the same, only there were dark rings under my eyes. I was definitely pale, but it was the small writing that caught my attention.
On the side of my neck, I could clearly see the same writing I had seen before. Afanas, one of the classical vampires I had met while I was with Alex, had these same markings on his face, and now staring hard at my reflection I could see the small red and black emblem clearly tattooed onto my neck.
I moved closer, watching myself in the mirror and closely observing every move my other self made. She smiled back at me. Her eyes had a hint of red flushing through them, and although she looked thinner than usual she also looked remarkably healthy. But what I found startling the most was the fact that there was no trace of the dark shadow. Her low neckline gave me enough room to see that the shadow had gone from between her breasts, and unlike my own body, hers was more curvaceous.
Taking my eyes off her face for a second, I watched a dark silhouette approach my other self from the left. The red eyes stared back at me, looking deep inside me. I could feel the pull of his glare and drew my eyes away sharply. Looking at my feet, I resisted staring back at the mirror, afraid of what I might see. Bewilderment filled my head. I was totally confused by what I was seeing, and afraid it was some kind of looking glass into my future, a future that saw me as one of the Nelapsi.
I turned my head again to watch myself in the mirror. The smile that had been there moments ago was gone and had been replaced by a frown. My other self stared hard at me, shaking her head in annoyance. At her side stood someone familiar to me, someone who had been a friend to me during some of the hardest times of my life, but he was a fake and never really cared for me.
Alex stood with a smug grin on his face. His green eyes glowed with the same reddish tint I had seen so many times before. He looked stronger, and his skin radiated a healthy glow, and in comparison with my other self he looked more alive than usual. He put his arm around her shoulder and squeezed tight. Looking up at him, she smiled, and that was when I saw them.
Clear as day, my fangs shone in the dim light. Their tips were sharp like razors, and I could not help but notice how the contours of my lips had changed. She stared back into Alex’s face so lovingly. I could not believe it. After everything he had done on me, was this really what was to become of me? Sickened by what I was seeing, I ran from the room and continued until I ran out of places to run. I stood still at the end of the garden hidden by the low-lying branches of the willows and oaks.
My mind raced and, finally giving in to my emotions, tears began to fall in formation from my eyes. I sat in the grass sobbing hard. I cried until the same fluttering sensation took my attention.
This time, the feeling was more intense and, looking down, I rested a hand on my bump and felt the sweeping sensation of butterflies floating inside me. I made me smile. I wiped my tears away and lay down on the soft grass. The sun glistened in through breaks in the branches and birds sang their harmonious songs. The pain and anger I had felt was gone and, feeling much calmer, I enjoyed the moment with my unborn child who already had a special way of making me feel better.
“You will be loved, you know!” I whispered to my baby. “I can honestly say that somehow things will be okay... I will die for you before I let Alex or Atarah get their hands on you.”
Resting my hands on my belly, I closed my eyes and fell into a peaceful sleep.
Chapter 5
Alex
“They can’t keep her hidden forever,” Atarah remarked.
“That’s all very well, but I have to get her back here. She has my child growing inside her, and as long as she carries the heir she must remain with us.” I tried to control my growing frustration.
Atarah got up from her chair and walked up to the long bay window that captured the golden haze of the full moon. Its glow highlighted the contours of her beautiful face that was etched with anger.
“I believe we will see our dear little Giselle sooner than you think,” she said, smirking.
I walked up behind her and gently brushed the bare flesh of her arms. She turned her head to me and smiled. Her green eyes widened and she opened her mouth, her delicious white fangs glistening as she brushed her lips against mine.
Breathless, I gave in, and found myself drowning in the glorious fountain of desire.
I had to grab my senses and hold on, and I pulled away from the embrace. Confusion swept across her face, and for a moment I felt guilt, but the anger welled further and deeper inside me.
“What is wrong?” she all but whispered.
“I need my senses, not this... this nonsense. I need to think, and I can’t do that with you here. Leave me alone,” I shouted.